PERSONAL NARRATIVE
Walking in His World While
Helping Him Into Ours
By Andrea TAYLOR
Until he turned three, I felt like everything we were going through was just what kids
went through. Then Damien stopped talking, made repetitive movements, and we
noticed him doing different things with textures and sounds. We know now he has
sensory problems, but I am not going to lie, I felt so lost during that time. We went to
doctor after doctor and were told that he would stop on his own, and when we finally
got him the referral to the head autism center, we had to wait over a year to be seen.
A
s a mom, I can tell you that Damien’s be-
haviors could be scary and aggressive,
and they scared and overwhelmed me. I
thought if I did better, he would do bet-
ter—but my family said it was because he
didn’t have enough discipline. I couldn’t
stand that I was allowing myself to feel
anger for a four-year-old child because I was letting
people fill my head with the lie that he could control
it.
In March of 2016, we officially got the autism spec-
trum disorder (ASD) diagnosis. I broke down for 24
hours thinking I must have done something wrong
(obviously, I know now I didn’t). I was just so angry
that my baby was having to go through this, that he
was trapped in his own world, and I didn’t have the
key yet. After that 24-hour period crying and throw-
ing a pity party, I stood up and started reading ev-
erything I could about kids on the spectrum, I got
him specialists, and I figured out I was no longer an-
gry anymore. I knew the problem, and I knew that
I was going to be there right next to him however
he needed me. Other people offered judgments still
claiming we just needed to force him to do things,
and they didn’t want to take him in public in case he
had a bit of a sensory meltdown. I decided right then
and there that if my family didn’t want to learn, that
was fine because I would learn all I could. He even
went to a special preschool and started kindergarten
Autism Parenting Magazine | Issue 65 |
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