April 2019 April 2019 | Page 37

CONTINUED APRIL 2019 itsnever2latebooks.com new designer shoes go on sale this month. After all, my lifestyle demands new stuff once in a monthly blue moon. I ’m thinking this cake baby on 4 wheels is costing me a lot of money so it better be exceedingly self-indulgent. Hopefully, there will be no self-con- trol when my spouse and our guests dig in and de- vour Buddy the imitation. Y ea! It is an anniversary surprise celebration day. Genuine Buddy is parked in the driveway looking pretty spiffy. He is adorned with blue and white balloons and silver streamers. The guests have arrived and Bert will be here in one hour. He is at the barbershop getting his usual monthly haircut. B ut, where the hell is the glorious reproduction Buddy cake? Just then a big forklift truck pulls up to our driveway. OMG, it’s a full-size replica cake of Buddy sitting on a beauti- fully carved powder blue platform. The wheels are THE GOLF CART CHRONICLES covered in baby blue glitter, and sit- ting in the driver’s seat was a life-size replica of Bert. I t was perfect timing for a fabulous VIP red carpet arrival. Bert was standing there in front of the twin Buddy Golf Carts with his mouth hanging down to the glitter covered driveway. Even a selfie would not do justice to this exhibition. I t was amazing and worth every single dollar and then some just to see my proud partner so happy. That was the good part. H ere is the ending of my story. Can you believe anyone (includ- ing Bert) did not get to devour any part of his copy golf cart cake? Why? B ecause my entitled husband insisted “you can’t eat a golf cart, especially this one. It is just too good to eat. This masterpiece is a keep- er.” Bert named his new impostor twin Buddy Boy. It was encased in a hemispherical dome for display purposes and to protect Buddy Boy from harm. A prestigious country golf club has it on view in their main lobby area. O h yes, I did tell Bert the sample piece of taster cake, when order- ing Buddy Boy from the cake maker guy was decadent. Whoops, did I just put the cart before the horse? It has been so much fun playing with words to bring about amusing and entertaining stories portraying people and other living things as out of the ordinary. So, I wrote, and wrote, and wrote for over sixty- five years. Each article was stored away in a box never to see the light of day until now. AVAILABLE ON AMAZON Golf Cart Chronicles 1 & Golf Cart Chronicles 2 golf carT chronicles By Suzy 2 James lf Cart The Go les 2 ic n Chro lf Cart The Go les 2 Chronic n of mpilatio stories rous co A humo g related short /golfin golf car tion of A humorous compila golf car/golf ing related short stories Suzy James [email protected] itsnever2latebook books.com www.itsnever2late By Suzy James APRIL 2019 37