50 Years of Umko 1966 - 2016 1966 - 2016 | Page 35
And for quite a few of all the above paddler-species it’s MAINLY about those
annoying movable obstacles and distractions: Their mates! Rivals. Enemies even.
Their whole race is focussed on one single obsessive aim: Beat old Jim and Bob! or
‘Beat Dose Goons!’ They would rather finish 99th if Jim and Bob finish 100th rather
than 3rd if those buggers are 2nd! The biggest joy to this voluble gang - always
prominent at overnight stops - is to actually witness “Jim and Bob” swimming
or wrapping. A very few of them might be semi-’subtle’ (knowing their mates
wrapped in Gully they’ll ‘innocently’ ask “Which line did you guys take down
Gully?” as though they haven’t heard). But most are of the loud guffawing type,
loudly braying “Waa Ha! Enjoy your ghoef?” The REAL joys of canoeing!
Paul Chalupsky, Dragon, overtook Robbie Stewart, ex-Dragon, just before the
finish of the ‘72 race and pronounced as he paddled past (to go on and win by a
single minute, having trailed for three days) “That’s your bundle”.
Steve Doc Blanckenberg paddled with Mike Ellis “who was so talented and
powerful, it was a bit like riding a bicycle downhill. The boy was a genius in white
water and I took great pleasure in taking a case of beer off Kenny Reynolds and
Mark Perrow that year. Would have been even better had Kenny delivered the
beers personally! Obviously all credit to my partner though.”
“However nothing quite beat the excitement of paddling with Bruce Yakka
Gillmer in the back of my boat when we passed Dave Slim Dawid Gillmer and Mike
Head Hoffman as they were enjoying yet another horrific swim at Bad Rapid.” As
Steve and Bruce overtook them a mixed double was flying by, and Steve shouted
“Please let us on your wave! We have important business!” The MD obliged,
ensuring they beat the bastids! Says Steve: “Nothing like family rivalry after two
days in the Umkomaas Valley. Bruce Gillmer is still living on the bragging rights
of his one and only win over his cousin!”
Unconfirmed rumour has it Head ruefully grinned “ffQokes!” at the finish.
Of course Blanckenberg and Bruce probably made a point of meeting them and
asking an innocent “What kept you guys?”
Some Umko paddlers are a fine mix of racers and trippers, and some winners
become trippers. The pre-eminent example is Charles himself. Chris Wade paddled
three Umkos with Charles. In the first two he turned to Chris on the water just
before the start and said “You’re not in a hurry are you?” He then proceeded to
drift through the rapids at a steady pace, taking all the right lines and ending up
well up the field by dint of keeping going and not swimming.
Even current winners have mixed race/trip feelings. Hank McGregor, reigning
champ, writes “To me this race is more of an adventure that every paddler should
enter. My most memorable Umko is every one that I have entered and completed,
as each has its special moments and its own story to tell. Every time I arrive at
Hella Hella I first stop at the bridge and nervously glance at the water hoping for
a gentle level to be running, but when I think about it there really isn’t such a level
because the Umko can teach even the best of river paddlers a lesson when she feels
like it.
“I hope this race never changes as it holds the number one spot on the canoe
calendar as the most exciting and enjoyable race to finish. This race is for the most
confident, skilled, brave, stupid or ignorant paddlers we have in our family of
canoeists, but rest assured: If you manage to finish an UMKO there is no other race
to fear, as the Umko is as extreme as it gets. I look forward to Umko 2016 and what
memories it will bring.”
How people first come to the Umko varies. Rob Davey has an interesting prepaddling-days tale. As a schoolboy in 1967 he cycled from Park Rynie to the finish
to see these crazy rivermen he had heard and read about. He watched the first
two paddlers arrive. “K1s were paddled in teams of two in those days. As they
hit the bank this very excited paddler talking with a strange accent proceeded to
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Winners of the race
1966 Charlie Mason & Ken ‘Tank’ Rogers
1967 Paul Chalupsky & Glyn Horton
1968 Paul Chalupsky
1969 Paul Chalupsky & Kevin Culverwell
1970 Paul Chalupsky
1972 Paul Chalupsky & Tony Scott
1973 Tony Scott
1974 Paul Chalupsky & Tony Scott
1975 Graeme Pope-Ellis & Bevan W orlock
1976 Clive Curson
1977 Paul Chalupsky & Tony Scott
1978 Rory Pennefather & Jerome Truran
1979 Rory Pennefather & Tony Scott
1980 Sunley Uys
1981 Chris Greeff & Lance Park
1982 Chris Greeff & Tim Cornish
1983 Graeme Pope-Ellis & Tim Cornish
1984 Tony Scott & Dave McCormack
1985 Oscar Chalupsky & Matt Carlisle
1986 Richard Starr & Colin Simpkins
1987 Oscar Chalupsky & Greyling Viljoen
1988 Sean Rice & Colin Simpkins
1989 Oscar Chalupsky & Greyling Viljoen
1990 Grant Woollaston & Ken Reynolds
1991 Robbie Herreveld & Neil Evans
1992 Robbie Herreveld & Neil Evans
1993 Robbie Herreveld & Neil Evans
1994 Roy Pepper & Rob Oliario
1995 Robbie Herreveld & Mark Perrow
1996 Robbie Herreveld & Mark Perrow
1997 Graham Monteith & Robbie Herreveld
1998 Graham Monteith & Robbie Herreveld
1999 Robbie Herreveld & Graham Monteith
2000 Robbie Herreveld & Graham Monteith
2001 Shaun Biggs & Sven Bruss
2002 Deon Bruss & Ant Stott
2003 Deon Bruss & Ant Stott
2004 Deon Bruss & Ant Stott
2005 Deon Bruss & Ant Stott
2006 Shaun Biggs & Clinton Pretorius
2007 Deon Bruss & Shaun Biggs
2008 Deon Bruss & Len Jenkins Jr
2009 Grant vd Walt & Hank McGregor
2010 Jacques Theron & Piers Cruickshank
2011 Hank McGregor & Brandon vd Walt
2012 Hank McGregor & Grant vd Walt
2013 Hank McGregor & Grant vd Walt
2014 Hank McGregor & Grant vd Walt
2015 Hank McGregor & Andy Birkett
UMKO 50 Years