JACQUELINE GRAD MENAKER
vbeu ' cr lk vag: rnut vhjrp ic gauvh /, ufz; fk ostv kf, t is huvu ' rcj lk
Yehoshua said: Make for yourself a Rav( a teacher); acquire for yourself a friend; and judge every person on the positive side.
~ Pirkei Avot 1:6
As a child, I always had conversations with God. My family always wondered who I was talking to, but that never bothered me. My earliest Jewish memories are filled with warmth. But, after my parents divorced, much of the Jewish ritual of my early years faded to the background. We left our heavily Jewish enclave on Long Island and moved to Plantation, FL. In those days the neighboring city was known to have KKK presence. Some kids at my new middle school were openly antisemitic and I struggled to make sense of my new environment.
By the age of 14, my religion became the world of musical theatre, my nusach( prayer modes) jazz motives and my call to embody the Prophetic principles instilled by my activist parents was found on stage through the performance of cutting edge drama.
Years later, I found myself living in the UK after a stint with the Royal National Theatre in London. Immersed within the creative circles of the London theatre scene, I was once asked to respond to events in the Middle East during the early days of the First Intifada. Since I was the only Jew in the group, they sought my perspective.
After eight years spiritually adrift in the UK, I returned to the United States with one goal, to discover more about my Jewish self. This journey led to me to CRJ in Orlando. After acceptance to the cantorial program at HUC-JIR, I became an invested cantor in 2007. As my role as co-clergy at CRJ deepened over the years, I began to feel that my calling to the cantorate was actually a step in my ultimate journey towards the rabbinate.
Since 2020, I have been blessed to serve Shirat Hayam in Ventnor, NJ as its Reform Spiritual Leader. A blended Conservative and Reform synagogue, the community has supported my journey to the rabbinate and“ walks the walk” of Jewish pluralism on a daily basis.
And yes, I still speak to God. While I may now understand the stirring of my heart as Hitbodedut, the spontaneous, private, and direct meditative communication modeled by Rabbi Nachman of Breslov, my soul recognizes it as“ home.”
But I couldn’ t answer. In fact, the deeper I probed my own beliefs, my own Jewish identity felt as unformed and void as Genesis chapter 1 verse 2 uvcu uv, v, hv.
After years of wandering, I found myself at the West London synagogue. It proved to be a pivotal moment for me. I heard a prayer that I recognized from my childhood chanted beautifully by a synagogue choir and I stood and wept.
AJR 2025 9