CLOSE UP
Learning to Look at Your Child
Through ABILITY Lenses
By Rachna Sizemore Heizer
M
y autistic son has attention and language processing issues, which meant
that schools often assumed he was incapable of learning. School staff regularly wanted
to keep him apart from his non-autistic peers in
order to work on what he did poorly – communicate and pay attention. They never stopped to
consider what he did well – how social he was,
his passion for all things musical, his ability to
observe a situation and figure out how to survive in it, his ability to memorize and remember
EVERYTHING. No one talked about that. No
one even noticed.
do. Look at your child with ability, not disability, in mind, and then talk about them that way
when talking to the teachers. If we don’t do this,
we cannot expect our schools to do this. Show
educators WHY they need to treat your child
like they treat everyone else, as human beings
whose potential is being developed rather than
human beings whose deficits are being addressed. My son is a brilliant musician but will
probably never pass a state standardized test.
Regardless, his school is now very invested in
his future because NOW they see that he has a
path to a productive life, pursuing his passion.
Last year, in 7th grade, my son was invited
to play his guitar and sing at Unplugged, the
acoustic show hosted by the high school theater
department. He was one of only six middle
schoolers to ever be asked to perform at Unplugged in 19 years.
The second thing you have to do is be persistent, trust your instincts and work as hard as
you expect others to work. I realized my son
had a passion for music but had no idea he was
good at it. Nevertheless, I started trying to find
him a music teacher. It took us three teachers
before we found one willing to truly teach my
son music, and it took our willingness to sit in
on lessons to help with communication where
needed for my son to grow as much as he did.
How did we get here from
where we began?
First and foremost, I learned to look at my child
through ability-focused lenses. Too often we
[parents] are worried about all the things our
children CAN’T or WON’T do, and we forget
to nurture the things they CAN or WANT to
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ZOOM Autism through Many Lenses
“Show educators
WHY they need to
treat your child like
they treat everyone
else, as human beings whose potential
is being developed
rather than human
beings whose deficits
are being addressed.
”
In November 2013, my son, then age 11, stood
on a stage on the National Mall in Washington DC in front of a crowd of thousands and,
with his crooked half grin, asked the audience,
“you all having a good time today?” And as the
crowd roared, he strummed his guitar and sang.
In the crowd were four of his former and current teachers, with tears in their eyes, watching
the boy who could only read at a kindergarten
level rock out in front of thousands who loved
him. And no one there doubted his ability.
ZOOM Autism through Many Lenses
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