Zest Lit Issue 2, October 2013 | Page 112

The De-evolutionary Battle of the Evolution Revolution

or

Huh? | Rhonda Hernandez

Exactly! Huh? One assumes the usual course of evolution begins at the beginning, has its middle, and progresses to its natural end before evolving into something new in order to survive. The Evolution Revolution. Makes sense right? There are books on it and everything. Ever heard of Darwin? How about South Park? They did a mean episode on evolution. Anyway, I had thought of writing about my own Evolution Revolution . . . you know, beginning, middle, natural end to the old while evolving into the new and improved. And while this is a tale of evolution at the end of the day, it is more precise to say it is a de-evolutionary one first, as it requires starting at the end and moving backwards before moving forward again.

So, welcome to the De-evolutionary Battle of the Evolution Revolution. Kind of like the Battle of Gettysburg only this one doesn’t use guns (yet}, we don’t wear uniforms (unless housecoat and slippers count} and takes place in the minefield that is my kitchen and not a pasture full of cow patties somewhere in Pennsylvania.

How did this De-evolutionary Battle begin?

One word.

D-I-V-O-R-C-E.

Capital D, capital I, capital kiss-my-ass ORCE . . . D I V O R C E.