MY LIFE AS A FOODIE
text
CHARITY KEITA
Out of
Pocket
Out of
Mind
I have always prided
myself in steering
clear of both New
Year’s resolutions
and post-Christmas
extreme diets.
Charity Keita uses her empty
wallet to her advantage during the
post-holiday foodie blues.
S
tep one: I emptied all
food from the refrigerator
and cupboards (including
the custard eggs and
marshmallows hidden at
the back)
Step Two: I wrote two lists: on one
I compiled the “good” foods; on the
other I compiled the “bad” foods.
Alcohol is obviously bad, although
whether it is a food or not is up for
debate.
Step three: Based on the “good”
foods list, I wrote a menu that
would see me through to the month
of March. No sugar, refined carbs,
alcohol, fat, gluten and red meat ever
appeared on said menu.
Step four: I looked at the menu,
felt a wave of revulsion and
proceeded to rip it all up and head
to the closest Chapo Mayai (eggs
rolled in Chapati) stall for a midmorning snack.
Step five: I put the food back in
the cupboards minus the stuff which
was over six months out of date.
I have always prided myself in
steering clear of both New Year’s
resolutions and post-Christmas
extreme diets. Which isn’t to say I
haven’t been tempted, it’s just that
I’ve always suspected that they were
destined to fail, so why start in the
first place? That said, the Christmas
food orgy that I was treated to
courtesy of Mama Luan (my fiancé’s
mother back in Portugal) last month,
really left me wondering if 2015
might be the year to at least consider
modifying my food intake for a
month or so.
One fly in the ointment that
was already buzzing at the back
of my head, was the inevitability
with which NRW (that’s the 22nd
of January in case you still haven’t
caught on) would scupper my plans
for food virtuosity (or deprivation,
whatever way you choose to look at
it). This gave me exactly twenty days
to come up with an eating plan that I
would actually stick to.
Luckily for me, it being January,
both Luan and I were utterly broke.
So guzzling French wine while
devouring an aged T-bone steak from
Prime Cuts, was out of the question.
Being broke can be a friend or an
enemy to reducing the amounts of
“bad” foods you ingest. If you are
well prepared, cook in advance and
stick to pulses, veggies and minimal
amounts of ugali/rice/pasta (these
last three are “bad” foods mind you,
so if you can afford the wholemeal
version by all means go for it), you
can eat cheap every day. However
the problem arises when you are
hungry but have failed to cook and
there is only the aforementioned
Chapo Mayai stall nearby. Bad food
is often super cheap; they hook
you into it and you keep on going