If God Does Exist
By - James Lawrence
God is Like a Certain Celebrity Sex-Tape
God, to me, is like the Hannah Minx sex video (just Google her if you don’t
know her)—we all want it to be true, and it would provide millions of people
across the globe instant gratification, but there is no solid evidence of its
existence. We have to look at facts; while lots of people have claimed to
have seen it, and there are even grai ny, cloudy images that kind of resemble
her in a way, at the end of the day, the actual video has not surfaced. You’d
think with that many people searching for it, someone would have found
something substantial, but that hasn’t been the case. So until I am given the
link to this video, I am inclined to believe that there is no such video, or at
the very least I will not proclaim any knowledge of what happens on said
footage should it exist. But this is where theists fall down (I am no longer
using the Hannah Minx sex tape analogy anymore by the way), because
instead of admitting that they truly have no idea what an entity like God
could want from us, they pretend they know exactly what he is thinking. To
be honest, I think he’d find that kind of arrogance more insulting than my
disbelief.
I’m an Ant and Proud of It!
If I owned an ant farm and the ants were unaware of my existence and went
about their day I’d be okay with that. If, however, they started forming little
groups and started to hate or segregate other ants for whatever reason and
they did it in my name, I’d have a problem with that, because it is bringing
me into it. Let’s just say it was a massive ant farm with many different
colonies; now one ant in one colony writes a book about me, despite having
no connection with me at all, no real understanding how he came to be but
proclaiming I gave him this knowledge when I didn’t; I as his “maker” would
have a problem with that. Especially because on the other side of the farm in
a different colony, another ant is writing another book about me with the
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