Yawp Mag ISSUE 20: The Festival that Was | Page 35

ownhall
Doorman
Being a doorman has meant that Van Kalken
has met a whole range of people; he’s had
a number of brushes with fame, but enjoys
getting to know the average Joe just as
much. “The clientele that come to the comedy
festival are so diverse”, he says, and he loves
getting to meet them. “What I love about
the comedy festival, this might sound a bit
strange”, he laughs, “I think it’s just fantastic
that young people are leaving their mobile
phones, they’re leaving their computers,
and they’re going to see an art form that’s
thousands of years old. Aristotle was up on
young people to see a live act!”
He admires the comedians greatly for their
bravery, standing up on stage and performing.
“I’ve done some public speaking,” Van Kalken
confesses, “and I was always very fortunate
because I’m short-sighted. So I used to just
take off my glasses. If you wanna go into
comedy or acting and you’ve got crook eyes,
that’s a great advantage!”
When asked about his most memorable
encounter, he says the most classic
example was when Melbourne hosted the
Commonwealth Games and the red carpet
was rolled out of the Town Hall, down the
steps and out to the Portico balcony. “We
were waiting for Prince Edward from the
House of Windsor. The mayor was standing
at the top of the stairs with the premier and
the president of the Commonwealth Games
Federation,” he recalls.

“Anyway, they were standing at the top of
the stairs and a very plain car pulls up, out
jumps Prince Edward, he walks straight
across to me, standing at the bottom [of the
stairs] and he says, ‘how do you do?’ And I
didn’t know what to call this man! So I said,
‘welcome to the Town Hall, Prince Edward!’
He didn’t look like one of those royals! Just
plain, ordinary. I was shaking his hand and
I looked up and they saw me shaking his
hand and down they ran! He came three
times in that week and he’d always come
straight over to me, and ask ‘how do you
do?’ He was lovely!”
Van Kalken reminisces on the growth of
the festival, exclaiming that, “it’s just gotten
huge! Bigger and bigger. Bigger than Ben
Hur now!” He also believes it has grown
more professional; as people learn about
what works and what doesn’t, they adapt
and the festival just gets better, “better
technology, better lighting, better staging.
It’s just so clever”.
It’s clear that Paul the doorman loves his job
and the festival, saying “with the Comedy
Festival, you can see all different types of
comedy. And they challenge a whole range
of issues. I think that’s fun. Healthy. Good
for democracy. I’ve been here for twelve
years and I’d like to be here for another
dozen.”