Jamaican & Trini – Look In De Freezer
A Jamaican and a Trinidadian, waiting at the pearly
gate, strike up a conversation.
How yu dead?” the Trinidadian man asked the
Jamaican. “Me freeze to death man,” says the Jamaican. “That’s awful, how it feel fi freeze to death?”
asked the Trinidadian. “Well bredda it very uncomfortable at first, when de cold jus lick yu, yu whole
body start fi shake an’ you get pain inna yu finga
an’ toe. But eventually, it a very calm way fi dead.
Yu get numb an’ den yu; jus drift off, like when yu’
sleeping.”
For Money??
A young Jamaican yute, Errol, asks his step-dad for
some help. He says, ‘
“How yu dead man?” asked the Jamaican. “I have
heart attack”, says the Trinidadian.
“Yu see, me did know say mi wife was cheating pon
mi, so one day mi show up at home unexpectedly.
Mi run up to de bedroom an’ fine har alone, knitting.
“Mi run down to de basement, but no one was hiding
there. Mi run up to de
second floor, but no one was hiding there either. Mi
run as fast as mi could to de attic, an’ just as mi get
there, mi had a massive heart attack an’ dead.”
Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?’
His step-father looks up thoughtfully, and says, ‘Mek
mi show yuh. Go ask your mother if she
would sleep with Beres Hammond for one million
dollars.
Next, ask your sister if she would sleep with Beres
Hammond for one million dollars. Then go ask your
brother if him would sleep with Beres Hammond
for one million dollars. Then come back and tell
me what you find out.’The yute is puzzled, but he
decides to see if he can figure out what his stepfather
means.He asks his mother, ‘Mammy if someone
gave you a million dollars would you sleep with
Beres Hammond?’ His mother looks around slyly,
and then with a little smile on her face says, ‘Don’t
tell yuh poopah, but yes, I would.’Then he goes to
his sisters room and asks her,’Sis, if someone gav