Writers Tricks of the Trade VOLUME 10 ISSUE 1 | Page 29

Crime conference. Among other books, he
writes the Puzzle Lady series, and is a
very clever, witty fellow. Likewise, his
books are very entertaining. Hall claims
not to be a stranger to this ”empty house"
phenomenon. But he does something I
can't do, even in the shower—he sings.
From the first time I saw his 2009 video
when he ran it during his talk at the
conference, I knew it was a winner.
A big "Thank You" to YouTube for
giving us the video link. Take the time to
watch it. You will love it. To date this
hilarious video has had over 60,000
views. Now that I think about it, maybe I
should take singing lessons. Nah! Even
with lessons an off-key voice like mine
would clear the room.
Recently I read on Facebook that
Parnell is facing a really serious health
challenge. Along with countless others, I
posted an encouraging message and
maybe you would like to do so, too. It
made me remember this video and I felt
compelled to share it and my own “no
show” memories.
By the way, one person did show up at
my disastrous Meet the Author event—
she was looking for the ladies’ room!
After she was pointed in the right
direction, for more than half an hour I
made small talk with the librarian,
holding out hope someone might actually
come. Finally, we chalked it up to a
signing and presentation that didn’t draw.
We never did figure out why that
happened. Did my fans fall through a hole
in front of the door? We’ll never know.
However, all was not lost. There were
W INTER 2020
some delicious chocolate chip cookies. Ah,
chocolate. The great soother.
As for the failed panel presentation,
there were five people on the stage and
three in the audience. A few of the
authors were quite high profile, so once
again, it was one of those unfortunate
happenings. As an author you learn to
have a thick skin and hone your ability to
wing it. Consequently, we four authors
plus moderator presented a wonderful
panel discussion to three people as
though there wasn't an empty seat in the
large library theater—well, actually there
were three people until one left half-way
through with an embarrassed expression.
Then there were two. Seems that lady had
wandered in to kill time while waiting for
someone who was picking her up.
Whatever the situation, if you find
yourself at a signing where no one comes,
don’t despair. Things like that come with
the territory and as an author you must
do everything you can to promote
yourself.
Also, popular places for signings are
changing. Once the exclusive realm of
bookstores, now signings are held in all
sorts of venues like coffee shops, grocery
stores, senior’s communities—you name
it. Just like the publishing models are
evolving, the entire book scene is
changing.
It is good to have some promotional
materials like table runners and signs
handy because they make you more
visible.
P AGE 24
W RITERS ’ T RICKS OF THE T RADE