EDIT NOTE
IF POLITICAL CANDIDATES WERE WATCH BRAND AMBASSADORS
If you were to define marketing real estate based on exposure, few places would compare to political candidates. Leaving the polarizing aspects of personalities out of the equation, presidential candidates rival natural disasters, cat videos and porn for the sheer volume of attention they can draw, making them a virtually untapped vehicle for branding. And what industry loves its celebs more than luxury goods? Face it, all candidates serve masters that hide in the shadows, why not take full advantage of their moment in the limelight and use them as branding vehicles, sort of like human Nascars. For the watch industry, they’ re a natural.
JFK, the last mega-branded president, single handedly ended the market for men’ s hats, propelled Wayfarer style sunglasses( for the record he wore American Opticals), and legendarily wore a( wait for it) Omega watch. So, in our make-believe scenario of branded presidential ambassadors, here’ s a matchmaker’ s list of 2016 presidential candidates and brands that might( or might not) benefit from association.
The BRM Bomber series Mitsubishi Zero seemed like the first choice of a watch for Donald Trump. It’ s an in-your-face stunner that screams“ look at me or I’ ll kill you!” However, given the size of the candidate’ s hands, this watch would sit on his wrist like a Flava Flav neck clock. Instead, a more appropriate pairing would be the smallish, diamond encrusted Cartier Santos; perfect for the man who doesn’ t want his personality to be outshined by his choice of bling. Moving one notch down on the loudness scale brings us to Bernie Sanders, who may or may not be a candidate by the time this piece is printed. Nonetheless, we need a list with more than two names. Sanders’ own style is more pocket watch than wrist watch, but this isn’ t the focus of this magazine. Sanders’ frumpy, rumpled approach requires a watch that keeps it simple and will never do anything besides tell time, and they don’ t come much simpler than a NOMOS classic Tangente.
He may be out of the race by the time this piece sees print, but he’ ll probably still be making noise, at least he’ ll be talking to the voice from God that he hears in his head. Ted Cruz, a candidate who represents an interesting mix of ethnicities, and countries, requires a watch that is itself a chameleon. And what better choice for this Harvard-trained lawyer than the Jeager Le- Coultre Grand Reverso Duo, capable of changing face at the flick of a finger, and manually wound to represent the hard work that goes into being a Cruzer.
Finally, the most complicated and potentially highest profile candidate in this year’ s election cycle, is someone who has brand ambassador longevity. Hillary Clinton is controversial( ish), loud( ish), somewhat androgynous and needs a watch that Bill could wear in a pinch. What else is there besides the Panerai Luminor Marina automatic ladies watch?
It’ s just a matter of time before one of these ersatz ambassadors captures the White House. For the record, I think our Italian choice has the potential of winding up alongside the little blue dress and the little blue pill in the annals of presidential history.
Steve Lundin
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WRISTWATCH | 2016