When can I come and appear before God ?”
Captivating , isn ’ t it — the journey between “ as the deer ” and “ deep calls out to deep ,” the two parts many of us know the language of ? And how each of them , deprived of that journey , becomes so detached as to lose its reason for being written ? You might even say they become fluffy . Sentimental . Nice . But entirely removed from what produced their poetry . I think there ’ s something to be said about that . About how often worship songs borrow a phrase from here or there , mostly to shape those phrases into the same common statements and welltrodden pathways people expect . Nothing too scandalous . “ It ’ s from the Bible ,” the writers are quick to say , “ It ’ s from this passage .”
Oh , is it ?
“ I thirst for the living God ” is in Psalm 42 , sure . And to say , “ I thirst for the living God ” is one thing . But to say , “ I thirst for the living God because everything about all of this feels like the dead and distant past to me right now ” is another thing entirely .
Let ’ s consider now what the psalm have told us in reverse . ( And by that I mean forwards , since we started backwards .) Psalm 42 has a trajectory something like this :
I long for God like a deer longs for fresh water . I ’ ve been crying non-stop , overwhelmed with grief that distorts everything else I see . I ’ ve felt alone , abandoned , forgotten . I remember how I used to be so certain and so faithful . I would lead the people to the house of God with musical anthems that could not be contained .
But I seem to have lost touch with that . With that version of me . I have so little motivation . Why is this happening to me ? Why am I so completely tormented with depression and discouragement ? I mean , I ’ m sure one day I ’ ll find a posture of praise and worship earnestly again . But I ’ m just not there right now . If I ’ m honest , that ’ s the truth of it .
But I ’ ll continue to remember . Everywhere I go , I ’ ll remember God . Until change comes . Until something reawakens in me . Shakes me back to life . I will remember the torrents of God enveloping and overwhelming me even now . I ’ ll begin to hear their cacophony again , louder than any other sound . They ’ ve taken me over with the power of their flow . As deep calls to deep — one deep stream to another . Streams of remembrance . Oceans to meet my thirst . The grief and depression and discouragement and disillusionment will find the grace of daylight . And what overwhelms me now will be overwhelmed by something better . One abyss met by another .
I am desperately thirsty … but I will be saturated in the flood of what is to come .
Amazing . I feel like so many worship songs flirt with these ideas but fear to commit , as though they skim the edge of these ( very human ) experiences and refuse to go further . I mean , what would the people think ?
I can ’ t say I know what your people will think . But I do know that a writer of poetry and song once put these ideas down for congregational use and they ended up in the Bible . So , R if you resonate with these ideas , you ’ re in good company regardless of what anyone else thinks . ( And pretending otherwise isn ’ t changing that reality or impressing God anyway .)
But let ’ s talk more generally on how this can inform our process . The key takeaway , for me , is this : when you write from a psalm to spark a lyrical idea or whatever the case , it can deeply enrich your usage of a phrase or verse if your usage is informed by the context that produced it .
Too many worship songs are satisfied with reproducing WHAT the Bible says without showing interest in WHY the Bible said it .
Ask yourself : does my experience of these verses as utilized in the corporate worship songs I ’ ve known connect with the heart of the passage which brought them to us ? Or has it been largely detached from that substance and context ?
“ Deep calls to deep ” is about honestly longing to find earnest and passionate worship again . It ’ s not about being on the mountaintop , cheerleading the praisiest praise song ever . It ’ s about drowning when you feel estranged from that place and that experience . It ’ s about God still being with you , enveloping you when you just don ’ t feel it anymore — and when you think maybe there ’ s no one to sing this particular song with you . When you feel isolated and abandoned . “ As the deer pants / longs for water …” is about that same desperation in feeling lost . Like the fire ’ s gone out . Like the glory has departed . Like all you can do is hold on to what you remember of the past because none of it is resonating in the present .
And I ask you : how many songs which borrow these phrases to “ write from the Bible ” communicate any of that ? How many commit to these ideas ?
Sometimes the best you can do is to just be honest with your process . And that ’ s okay . God ’ s more than big enough to handle our thrashing about in the vast ocean of the Divine presence .
Are your songs ?
Are you willing to go there ?
I wonder how many churches could use writers like this right now .
Kevin MacDougall Worship leader , published and recorded songwriter , engineer and producer . macdougall . k @ gmail . com