WORSHIP LEADERS
HOW TO HANDLE CRITICISM FROM YOUR WORSHIP TEAM | Jon Nicol
Criticism. It's not a matter of if, but when. If conversation? If it’s not the right moment, Without that space, you both may regret the
you've been a worship leader for more than a suggest another time to talk. outcome.
ACKNOWLEDGE THE PERSON'S FEELINGS. Whether SEARCH FOR COMMON GROUND. Many complaints
Preparing to hear and deal with criticism is you agree or not, acknowledge their feelings arise because people want the best for the
crucial for a leader. Negative feedback can and perspective. Your immediate response worship ministry. Their assessment of what
be beneficial. It reveals both your blind-spots might be something like this: "I can see you feel is best may not match yours. But if you can
and growth areas that you might not have really strongly about this, and I know it wasn't find common ground in that desire to have an
otherwise acknowledged. easy to say this to me. I value our relationship. I excellent worship team, you can move forward
want to make sure you feel I've really listened to from there.
week, you already know this.
Now, when that criticism comes from one of you." This can help deescalate emotions. It also your team members, the stakes are higher. An gives you that extra space to figure out what to LOOK FOR THE GOLD. Even if you don't fully agree
interpersonal rift between you and a member say next. with their assessment, look for nuggets of
can affect the entire worship ministry. So,
wisdom you can learn about yourself and how
you have to prepare for criticism. Whether If the person is emotionally volatile or belligerent you lead. Conflict is a fantastic place to deepen
it's helpful or just plain hurtful, here are some to you, refuse to continue the conversation your self-awareness.
healthy actions you can take when it happens. with them until they've calmed down and can respectfully discuss the issue. More often, SEEK OTHER PERSPECTIVES. Ask some trusted
ADMIT IT HURTS. Even when constructive even if the confrontation starts off emotionally people if the criticism is valid. Again, this might
feedback is delivered graciously, kindly, and charged, just acknowledging the person's be a blind-spot for you. If it is, honest feedback
clearly for your benefit, it still stings. But feelings and showing them respect will pave will confirm it.
too often, a frustration or a concern gets the way to healthier dialog.
CALL FOR BACK-UP. If the complaint begins to
weaponized through unchecked emotions.
What should have been the sting of truth turns ASK CLARIFYING QUESTIONS. Dig deeper to feel like an unresolvable conflict, apprise your
into a wounding attack. discover out why this issue matters to this lead pastor (or whoever you report to) of the
person, especially if you don't initially agree with situation. They can help you deal with this
Regardless if it's a valid complaint against you their viewpoint. Also, a person's initial criticism escalating issue before it's too far gone.
or not, acknowledge to yourself and God that isn't always the real issue. There might be
it hurts to hear it. Just that moment of honesty something deeper. Invite them to tell you more. The final action I'll mention is this: WELCOME
IT. A team that can't express frustrations and
with yourself and the Holy Spirit can positively
affect what happens next.
RESIST DEFENSIVENESS. The instinctual part
BE QUICK TO ADMIT A MISTAKE. If you recognize concerns to their leader (or to other team
culpability, regardless of your intentions, accept members) will spiral into more dysfunction.
it. Don't make excuses or try to shift blame.
of your brain will likely kick in with a fight or
Inviting critical feedback is never fun. But
flight response. For your amygdala, a verbal If you don't think you're in the wrong, look for when you intentionally deal with issues, your
assault from your drummer is the same as a a way to acknowledge their hurt or frustration vulnerability invites deeper trust. And trust is
charging grizzly. Taking a moment to think and without saying, "I'm sorry you were hurt." your most vital asset for healthy leadership.
pray will help you hijack your natural instincts. That's a “non-apology” apology. It never helps.
You'll avoid becoming defensive or launching a
ASK FOR TIME TO PROCESS. When someone levels
regrettable counterattack.
a complaint at you, they've been thinking about
ASSESS THE CIRCUMSTANCES.
you it for a while. But for you, it's new information.
answer, take a moment to assess your context. While that person likely wants to address the
Is this the right place to talk about the issue? Is issue right now, you need space to process—
the person emotionally able to have a rational to think, pray, and possibly seek wise counsel.
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Before
April 2020
Jon Nicol
Jon’s the founder of WorshipWorkshop.com and
WorshipTeamCoach.com, two sites that help worship
leaders build strong teams and lead engaging
worship. He lives and serves in Lexington, Ohio with
his wife Shannon and their four kids.
WorshipWorkshop.com
WorshipTeamCoach.com
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