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ames Michael Sama is a blogger and speaker whose newfound popularity
has attracted over 27 million readers to his website, JamesMSama.com, in
less than a single year since its inception. Writing primarily on the subject
of dating and relationships, James broaches difficult topics that challenge
readers to reflect on their own approaches and determine how they can live happier
lives with more fulfilling relationships. James has gained his share of media attention,
being featured twice by Fox News, CafeMom’s Mad Life talk show, and on multiple
radio shows such as Uncovered With Dr. Laura Berman. His work is also frequently
published on The Huffington Post, AskMen.com, GoodMenProject.com, and more.
JAMES MICHAEL SAMA
People are jumping into relationships with
essentially no foundation or bonding process
between them. They are not experiencing each
other, learning about each other, absorbing
each other into their lives – before deciding to
make a commitment.
There’s an article in The New York Times called “The End of
it. Women in their 20’s these days are lucky to get a last-minute
Courtship?” which I find to be more than a little disappoint-
text to tag along. What? No. Just, no. How is this acceptable?
ing.The article discusses how men generally put minimal
How are these conversations not being had? Is this real life? I
effort into dating or women anymore and the extent of dates
am cringing. Literally cringing as I type this from the reverber-
these days is “hey babe I’m out with some friends, wanna
ation of that line, and many others from the article in question.
come meet up?”
I look like I’ve just been gnawing on a lemon.
…That’s a date? And women are accepting? Forget that
The article discusses a girl who goes home from the club with
nonsense. It’s impossible for a man to pursue you if he just…
a bouncer and how it “only lasts 4 months.” In other surprising
gets you. Simple concept. A date is something you plan. It’s
news: The sky is blue and water is wet. People are jumping
something you pay attention to. As time goes on and you have
into relationships with essentially no foundation or bonding
gotten to know each other a little better, I think spontaneity
process between them. They are not experiencing each other,
can be good – but you will find in the NYT article, that is not
learning about each other, absorbing each other into their
the concept in question. Here is an interesting excerpt from
lives – before deciding to make a commitment. Of course
the article: “It’s one step below a date, and one step above a
much of this happens after the commitment is made, but we
high-five,” she added. Dinner at a romantic new bistro? Forget
still need to be aware of the person we are giving our time to.
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