works for everyone, especially your par-
ent. If the decision involves a move for
your mom or dad, you could, even from
a distance, offer to arrange tours of some
places for their consideration.
Experts advise families to think
carefully before moving an aging adult
into an adult child’s home. There are a
lot of questions to consider. You must
think about their current condition, as
well as how their condition might dete-
riorate in the future. Can you cope with
the ongoing stress, involved in caregiv-
ing in addition to the following:
Is there space in your home? Con-
sider your home’s accessibility —
stairs to navigate, halls and door-
ways wide enough for a wheelchair,
etc.
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Is someone around to help the older
person during the whole day?
What are your parents able to do for
themselves?
What personal care are you willing
and able to provide — moving your
parent from a chair to a bed or toi-
let, changing adult diapers, or using
a feeding tube, for example?
What kinds of home care services
are available in your community?
What kind of specialized medical
care is available nearby?
Is there an adult day program in
your community? Or respite care
for when you need to take a much-
needed vacation?
These decisions are emotionally
charged and will be influenced by both
your parent’s attitude towards change
and that of your siblings toward pitching
in to help, possibly financially if not in
person. The relationship you have with
your parents and siblings will also factor
into how much resistance or cooperation
there will be to change.
Remind everyone involved that
your parents took care of you when you
were young and couldn’t care for your-
self. Now that the roles are reversed, you
are repaying their love and care by keep-
ing their well-being in their later years as
your ultimate goal.
March 2020 WNY Family 35