O
hesitation to learn can give your child the
reassurance he needs to keep striving.
ne of the biggest frustrations
parents face is getting their
children motivated to learn.
Whether it’s mastering multiplication,
learning a language, or sticking with the
soccer team despite riding the bench most
of the season, it can be difficult to get kids
to embrace learning.
Likewise, be respectful of your child’s
need for downtime. Giving children un-
structured time to play outdoors or simply
hang around the house lets them recharge
and process what they learned during the
structured part of their day. This boosts
creativity as children dream up ways to fill
their free time, and also builds character as
children play with — and resolve conflicts
with — other children their own age.
Our children’s reluctance to venture
into unfamiliar territory is understandable
—learning something new can be frus-
trating and failure can be discouraging or,
worse, embarrassing. However, parents
can take steps to help boost their children’s
eagerness to face new challenges.
Here are five strategies you can start
using today to help your child become a
motivated learner.
1) Encourage Your Child to See Learn-
ing as an Opportunity to Get Smarter,
Go Farther
Extensive research has shown a di-
rect link between what a child thinks of
her abilities and that child’s willingness to
face obstacles. Specifically, when children
see their abilities as fixed and not subject
to improvement, they worry that their intel-
ligence will be questioned whenever they
fail or exert too much effort in learning a
new task. As a result of this “fixed mind-
set,” these children view challenges as
potential sources of “looking dumb,” and
lose motivation when the work stops being
easy.
In contrast, children who believe that
the harder they work at something the bet-
ter they’ll get at it, see obstacles as oppor-
tunities to add to their skillset, not as poten-
tial blows to their self-confidence. Children
who display this “growth mindset” under-
stand that continuous effort is necessary to
succeed, and show an increased motivation
to keep learning even in the face of mis-
takes or failure.
Parents can encourage their children
to adopt a growth mindset by emphasizing
the strategies their children use in pursu-
ing a goal, rather than focusing on their
children’s ability. For example, use words
that praise your child’s efforts in achieving
a goal (“You studied hard and did great!)
versus words that praise your child’s intel-
ligence (“You got an A because you’re so
smart!”).
This emphasis on process boosts chil-
dren’s enthusiasm to learn by teaching them
that good results often come from persistent
effort, not necessarily innate ability.
30 WNY Family December 2018
4) Allow Your Children to Fail
5 Things You Can
Start Doing Today
to Raise a
Motivated Learner
— by Dolores Smyth
“Whether you think
you can or you think
you can’t, you’re right.
— Henry Ford
Although it seems counterintuitive at
first, part of helping children learn how not
to become discouraged when faced with a
challenge is to let them fail and learn how
to bounce back from that failure. Letting
children fail teaches them resilience and
how to take responsibility for the natural
consequences of their actions. Importantly,
when a child experiences how his poor ef-
fort leads to a poor result, the child may be
incentivized to refocus his efforts at suc-
ceeding.
In some children, the fear of failure
can be especially daunting. Try easing
these children’s fears by explaining that in-
novators they may admire — from Thom-
as Edison to Walt Disney to J.K. Rowling
— experienced numerous setbacks before
succeeding through unrelenting motiva-
tion and perseverance.
5) Lead by Example
2) Make Learning Fun
To further foster motivated learning,
parents can turn lessons into fun activities
by encouraging children to explore their
interests. If your child is interested in mu-
sic, sign him up to play an instrument of
his choosing or take him to children’s con-
certs.
If your child is interested in history or
dinosaurs, take her to a museum or head to
your local library to peruse through books
on the subject. For a younger learner, use
colorful puzzles and board games to help
your little one excel at concepts that pique
his interest.
3) Respect Your Child’s Frustrations
and Need for Downtime
It’s unreasonable to expect a child to
be motivated all of the time. When par-
ents don’t acknowledge a child’s frustra-
tion with learning new skills, the child is
more likely to disengage from the learning
process. However, exploring your child’s
One of the most effective ways par-
ents can teach their children to embrace
learning is to immerse them in a household
where the parents are enthusiastic about
learning as well. Show your child your
commitment to learning by reading avidly,
taking a class, or engaging enthusiastically
in a hobby of your interest.
Not only will your child see that
working hard doesn’t have to be a solitary
undertaking, but she will witness firsthand
the personal satisfaction that comes from
relishing a challenge.
Dolores Smyth draws inspiration for her
writing from everyday life. Her work has
appeared in such publications as Moth-
erly, Moms of Tweens and Teens, Savvy
Mom, and Busted Halo, among others. A
perfect day for her includes running, read-
ing, and spending time with her husband
and three kids. Connect with her @Lola-
WordSmyth.