You see , every time we are blasted in any way by someone “ mean ” or “ manipulative ” or “ evil ”, we are actually being asked to give these “ bad people ” what they want more than anything else — our annoyance , our sadness , our anger or our fear . And thus , when we choose to defend ourselves against their attacks — or run away , or sulk , or attack them in return -- we are actually giving them their most prized desire on a silvered platter . By responding in such ways , they have effectively manipulated us into giving them the very negativity they so desperately desire ; making them feel powerful on the short-term , and yet ultimately entrenching the very feelings of low self-esteem & self-loathing that inspired their poor behaviors in the first place .
In this way , your acts of “ self defense ” actually make your enemies that much stronger , and thus their future attacks much more likely … thereby making your life actually much LESS safe as well .
On the other hand , consciously responding to such dysfunctions with gentle Kindness is thoroughly unsatisfying to these “ villains ”. They want your condemnation , and yet receive your compassion … They want your hatred , and yet receive your Love … They want a victim either cowering or enraged , and yet receive someone behaving valiantly … And , if you decide to persist with such a courageously Caring response , these folks will have only one penultimate choice : either leave you alone to find their victim elsewhere -- or reawaken to the True Self they have forgotten , and start treating you like a Friend .
As such , quite ironically — and despite your ego ’ s fervent desire to believe otherwise , responding to attacks & aggressions with flagrant acts of humble Kindness is your best ( if not only ) form of effective “ self-defense ”.
Consider this with humility … … And please , enact it with Courage .
( inspired by John Frazee )
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