4 . Signals You Send
Just like every other aspect of culture , the signals you send after you ’ ve received hard feedback will speak volumes to your team . This includes both your immediate response and how you behave afterwards .
Are you seeing hard feedback as an opportunity to grow or as a challenge to your status ? Are you celebrating truth and diversity of thought or sending signals that yours is an unsafe team for those things to live . I ’ ve seen coaches inadvertently toxify their own culture after receiving hard feedback with snide comments , dismissive behavior , withdrawing from or distancing themselves from those that dared to be kind enough to tell them the truth as they see it . You don ’ t have to agree with all the hard feedback you receive , but if you want to grow , you have to be vigilant about celebrating it nonetheless . If you hope for this feedback loop to be a true loop , you have to give yourself time to process , respond with gratitude and celebrate this athlete or assistant coach who cared enough about the team to enter into a truly uncomfortable area so that you could grow .
When the right signals are sent , the feedback comes more freely , more often and , as a result , it will often feel much less intense .
5 . They ’ re Called Blind Spots for a Reason
Hearing feedback about ourselves can be tricky . Hearing it from people we lead can be a high-wire act . Our own personal EPUs — that stands for Ego Protection Units in case you weren ’ t aware — are gifted at helping us make sense of why little Johnny is out of his ever-loving mind or why Betty doesn ’ t know the first thing she ’ s talking about . And that ’ s not even the worst part — the worst part is that our EPUs might not be right . They might not be providing accurate feedback or they might be dishing us feedback with impure motives . Perhaps we hurt the feedback provider ’ s feelings or they disagree with the role we ’ ve placed them in . So why in the world would I give any credence to this thing they are telling me that my EPU assures me is just not possibly true at all … the outrage !! I get it and you ’ re right to have questions .
Let me say first , you ’ re not expected to agree that all hard feedback is true . You ’ re expected to listen , to understand their perspective , then process that information and allow it to inform future decisions and behavior .
Secondly , because we can ’ t fully see our own blind spots , hence the name , it is important that we look for patterns . View feedback as data and as such , be on the lookout for trends and patterns to inform your processing . By the way , I would suggest you count on patterns and trends for positive feedback as well as the negative things . After all , taking in the good stuff without thoughtful processing can be as limiting as rejecting the negative feedback because our EPUs are in overdrive .
Creating a Culture of Feedback , Drip , Drip , Drip …
Tip : Make gathering feedback a regular and consistent part of your team ’ s experience .
Now that we got the things that get in the way out of the way , here are some ways to make yours a culture where feedback , and thus growth , is a welcomed part of your team ’ s culture .
Oh the exit interview … how I don ’ t love thee . Asking players for feedback as they are walking out the door is a tool many athletic departments use and it is certainly a way of gathering information without the added pressure of fear of future retaliation . But the method leaves a whole lot to be desired if your intention is to consistently grow in real time . It also misses a really key benefit that feedback can offer — it doesn ’ t allow the athlete to be part of building the team they ’ re playing on . I would make similar arguments for the end-of-season meetings as the sole tool for gaining feedback . These methods are fine for checks and balances , sure . But they fall very short of positioning feedback as an important and valuable piece of building a long-standing , successful team culture .
Adding short feedback check-ins to your daily or weekly calendars and practice plans is a great place to begin . Adding these to your calendar sends the message that you value feedback , sets the expectation that you are inviting everyone to be an active part of molding the experience , and keeps everyone accountable and aware of what otherwise could be avoided . Regular check-ins can also proactively prevent the issues that often accumulate under the metaphorical rug during the course of a team ’ s season .
Keep them short and sweet , but be sure to consistently keep them . The few minutes you dedicate to these meetings will be time well spent in the long term .
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