lessens or undermines your resilience.7 The belief in one’s ability to
overcome adversity and achieve goals is called self-efficacy, simply
a fancy word for the type of confidence that grows resilience. You
build self-efficacy by building on small wins, through observational
experiences (watching other people bounce back triggers, “I can do
this, too”), and by getting frequent feedback about what’s going right.8 Recently, Microsoft revised how it works with outside law firms,
hoping to develop deeper relationships with outside counsel that
extend beyond the billable hour. One aspect of Microsoft’s new
strategic partner program is to establish new networks to connect
women and ethnically and racially diverse lawyers who represent the
company. 11
Cross-examine Your Thinking Distinguish Between Perfectionism
and Striving for Excellence
Lawyers spend years learning and then practicing how to “think like
a lawyer.” Professionally, lawyers are responsible for doing all due
diligence in a matter, analyzing what could go wrong in a situation,
and steering their clients away from negative effects. That’s important
when lawyers are engaged in the practice of law.
However, when lawyers look at issues through such a pessimistic,
rigid lens 12-14 hours per day, that thinking style becomes harder to
turn off when it’s not needed. Ultimately, it can undercut leadership
capabilities, interactions with clients, staff, and family, and the way life
is viewed generally.
Resilient lawyers cross-examine and reframe their unproductive
thinking in the following ways:9
• They seek to quickly understand where they have a measure of
control, influence, or leverage in the situation instead of wasting
their time and energy on things they can’t control.
• They look for measurable and specific evidence to support the
accuracy of their thoughts.
• They look for the middle ground to diffuse black-and-white or all-
or-nothing thinking styles.
• They think about what they would tell a friend in the same
situation (we often say things to ourselves that we wouldn’t say to a
friend or family member).
Cultivate Relational Energy
Lawyers cultivate high-quality relationships by paying attention
to their “relational energy.” Relational energy is how much your
interactions with others motivate, invigorate, and energize, rather than
drain or exhaust. Not surprisingly, research showed that a person’s
relational energy network predicted both job performance and job
engagement better than networks based on influence or information. 10
Endnotes
1. Terri Mottershead, Innovating Talent Management In Law Firms, ABA Law Practice Today,
Nov. 14, 2016, www.lawpracticetoday.org/article/innovating-talent-management-law-firms/.
2. Larry Richard, Herding Cats: The Lawyer Personality Revealed, 29(11), Rep. to Legal Mgmt.
(Aug. 2002).
3. See Richard, supra note 3, for percentile references.
4. National Task Force on Lawyer Well-Being (Aug. 2017). You can download a
copy of the report here: www.americanbar.org/content/dam/aba/images/abanews/
ThePathToLawyerWellBeingReportRevFINAL.pdf.
5. Scott A. Westfahl & David B. Wilkins, The Leadership Imperative: A Collaborative Approach
to Professional Development in the Global Age of More for Less, 69 Stan. L. Rev. 1713
( June 2017).
6. Paul B. Harms et al., Evaluation of Relationships Between Reported Resilience and Soldier
Outcomes. Report Number 2: Positive Performance Outcomes in Officers (Promotions,
Selections and Professions) Defense Technical Information Center (April 2011).
7. Mark D. Seery, E. Alison Holman & Roxane Cohen Silver, Whatever Does Not Kill Us:
Cumulative Lifetime Adversity, Vulnerability and Resilience, 99(6) J. of Personality & Soc.
Psychol. 1025-41 (2010).
Psychologists define perfectionism as a “multidimensional personality
trait characterized by striving for flawlessness and setting exceedingly
high standards of performance accompanied by overly critical
evaluations of one’s behavior,” and it includes a range of dimensions. 12
Perfectionistic strivings are aspects of perfectionism that are self-
oriented, internally focused, and associated with having high
standards. 13 Perfectionistic concerns are aspects of perfectionism that
are outwardly oriented, other focused, and associated with worries
about making mistakes and fear of negative social evaluation and that
drive the thought, “What will other people think?” 14
Perfectionism generally can be associated with a number of negative
outcomes, but perfectionistic concerns are the bigger problem.
Perfectionistic concerns drive higher levels of anxiety and burnout,
less healthy coping strategies and a rigid, all-or-nothing mindset. In
addition, perfectionistic concerns are linked to defensiveness (note
the link between defensiveness and low resilience mentioned above),
finding fault with yourself and others (lawyers jump at the chance
to spot misstatements, misspellings, or flaws and see it as vitally
important to correct people when they make a mistake), inflexibility,
excessive need for control, and not being able to trust others with
your work. 15
Conclusion
As the profession continues on the path of change and as lawyers
continue to try out new products, services, and ways of doing
business, failure will happen as a natural byproduct of innovation.
To be an effective and influential lawyer and leader in this era of
continuous change, you must have resilience in your toolkit.
Reprinted with permission of the February 2018 Wisconsin Lawyer, the
official publication of the State Bar of Wisconsin, and the author.
8. Albert Bandura, Self-Efficacy: The Exercise of Control 79 (New York, NY: W.H. Freeman &
Co. 1997).
9. Judith S. Beck, Cognitive Behavior Therapy Basics and Beyond, 2d Ed. 171 (New York, NY:
The Guilford Press 2011); see also Karen Reivich & Andrew Shatte, Resilience Factor
(New York, NY: Broadway Books 2002).
10. Bradley Owens et al., Relational Energy at Work: Implications for Job Engagement and
Job Performance, 101(1) J. Applied Psychol. 35-49 (2016).
11. David Ruiz, Microsoft Deputy GC: In New Outside Counsel Program, AFA’s Plus
Competition Equals Success, Law.com, Aug. 7, 2017, www.law.com/sites/almstaff/2017/08/07/
microsoft-deputy-gc-in-new-outside-counsel-program-afas-plus-competition-equals-success/.
12. Joachim Stoeber, How Other-Oriented Perfectionism Differs from Self-Oriented and Socially
Prescribed Perfectionism: Further Findings, 37(4) J. of Psychopathology & Behav. Assessment
611-23 (2015).
13. Andrew P. Hill & Thomas Curran, Multidimensional Perfectionism and Burnout:
A Meta-Analysis, 20(3) Personality & Soc. Psychol. Rev. 269-288 (2016).
14. Id.
15. Id. WL
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