Depression's Grey and God's Light
by Zak Krausman
My life is just a dark shade of grey,
As for which of my dues shall I pay?
To bring happiness and light?
Or to fall and lose all my might?
How many times a year does my heart cry?
A countless many for sure, but the pain is nigh.
How many nights have I longed for someone to hold?
Instead of a pillow which is lifeless and cold.
The cold feeling of the pain is like a knife driving into my heart.
My confidence is in shambles, and my life is being torn apart.
How much longer till I drop cold and dead?
Will my death be at night as I rest in bed?
So many questions, with so little time.
And even now I wait for the bell to chime.
Alone with my thoughts and prayers.
I close my eyes and ponder why nobody cares.
As the saving bell rings,
Many talk about such trivial things.
Taking the false as fact,
Do they not know how horrid the act?
Walking past so many whom have had their hearts broken,
They might as well just drop the token.
They do not so they can show off and boast,
Such is the act of a naive heart and thought unlikely by most.
So many times has my heart been played,
Why could I have not been slayed?
The numbness of my body as I send God my prayers,
The thought in question, why nobody cares?
Alone once more,
Sleep knocks on the door.
Relaxing me to dream as I sleep.
When I awake the sun takes it to keep.
Awakening the dawn of a new day.
"It's always the same" is what I say.
Thus the cycle starts once more.
Sometime maybe, my pain will break my heart's core.
And once again, left with only my prayers,
I ask, as so many like me do, why no one cares.
When I question, my thoughts often drift,
From topic to philosophy as I try to close the rift.
Rift? That idea of the gaps of facts?
Many people seem to be oblivious to this odd act.
But still this rift grows.
Like many whom have endured this, the pain shows.
My thoughts cost me many friends,
But is this the way the universe bends?
My conclusion is harsh but fair:
The fact is no one cares.
Why does nobody care?
Why does nobody care?
A question asked through the world we share.
Is this how God envisioned us? To go on with Satan whom gathers us in his snare?
No, he envisioned a peaceful world without hate.
God envisioned something meaningful that he himself could make.
God gave us the right to live.
He can easily take back all he has to give.
Yet he does the opposite, but why?
God could easily start over as our end is nigh.
And still God looks past that darkness of man.
But how come? Is it just because he can?
Is the reason right in front us?
Are people just too blind to look without a fuss?
May mankind ever agree to peace without consent?
The world would be at peace with no war, hate, and crime; as was God's intent.
This light I choose to see is one that lights my soul,
And for many I wish they could see it too, for there is no toll.
Calm, happiness, peace and long past loved ones is what I see.
The sorrow, depression, and loneliness are gone, my soul set free.
This is what takes place of my depression,
What was filled with grey is now colored with my progression.
I look to the better things in life and forget the bad as a whole,
For it was God whom brought me out of my sorrowful hole.
Though I still look my love to hold,
And still My life is not bold.
I am a son of the Lord most high whom has shown me light,
What challenges ahead are unknown, but I move forward against the fright.
Many times I will fall,
I will suffer, but stand stand tall.
God bless us all!
God bless us all!
He saved me from my sorrow,
So I may have a better tomorrow.
God bless all!
God bless all!