44 WESTERN PALLET
Know Thyself
Picture this: It’s Monday morning, time for our monthly sales check-in. I sit down across from Randy, the sales manager. I’ve been working for my dad for a few years now, and I’ve recently moved into sales. Randy, on the other hand, has been selling since before dirt was invented. He’s old-school—and very good.
Suddenly, he looks up at me from a stack of papers.
Peering over his readers, he blurts out, “You know your problem?”
“Um… huh?” I stammer.
“You’re not a good salesman,” answering his own question. “I mean, you’re just not a natural. I don’t think you’ll make it. Do you even like people?”
There was that feeling—that “pinch.” It would take me a minute to identify it, though. Initially, I just got mad.
Are you kidding me?!? Who does this guy think he is?!? Do I even like people?!? Well, I sure as heck don’t like HIM right now!!!
Calm down, Kev. You’re triggered. Don’t punch him. He’s an old man.
So instead, I said something polite and went to the bathroom.
I stared into the mirror.
Maybe he’s right. Maybe you’re no good at this, Kev. Maybe you ought to go to your old man and ask him to move you somewhere else in the company.
Here I was, only in the seat for a couple of weeks max, demoralized. What I needed was coaching and mentorship, not to be labeled as a failure. And wow! Randy’s lack of EQ—next level.
Side note: Judgments that brand other people’s identities are not good and most certainly not helpful.
Later that day, talking this through with my dad, he asked me to come up with 3 fundamentally true things about myself that I thought would make me a good fit in sales. So, I did, and while I’m not a “natural” at everything, I am good at a few things that led to much success in sales and beyond:
I have a gift for connecting deeply with others
I'm a wholehearted believer in everything I do
Generally, people have between 12,000 and 60,000 thoughts per day, and 80% are NEGATIVE. Worse yet, 95% of those negative thoughts are repetitive. They impact our moods, performance, and well-being, as well as the overall “negativity bias” affecting our lives. But it’s difficult enough to deal with negativity that originates with us, let alone that which comes from outside.
The truth is, we can’t control much—only that which comes from us. Said differently, “the only real form of control in life is self-control.”
So, what then? As Socrates said, “Know thyself.”
Live self-defined. Develop an internal anchor of understanding that defines who you are, the unique gifts you have been given, and the places where you’re not gifted.
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Food for Thought
Start simple. What are 3 or 4 things you bring with you everywhere? Not roles, titles, or platforms—the things that make you unique and help make up the gift that God made you to be to the world.
What are they? And how can they help you live self-defined?