Mindfulness and savoring 82 memory of these experiences, which therefore are not retained and deposited into the emotional bank account. These people don’ t get the real benefit of the beautiful experiences, small and large, that life has to offer. We need to be mindful and retain these valuable experiences amongst the otherwise overwhelming stress, illness and tragedy in the world. I have no doubt that this emotional remembering is not particularly different from our normal or language memory. We can hold a phone number in our short term memory just for long enough to dial it. If we do not hold it in our memory and go over it in some way to‘ learn’ it and move it into our longer term memory, then it is lost forever. To retain a phone number we have to notice it, or in the terms of our present discussion we need to be mindful of it. This is the process of learning. Savoring is the equivalent of learning when it comes to positive emotional experiences. It is the way we retain warm or loving memories. But just as we cannot recall a phone number that we did not take the time to notice, we cannot reminisce and enjoy the full pleasure of positive experiences we were not fully present for or mindful of. This is a skill we all need to learn. Those of us with children have a responsibility to teach it to them. For this reason, at special times with my children, on weekends and holidays, I will say to them something like,‘ Are you kids being mindful and making memories of that beautiful sunset?’( Who’ d be the kid of a shrink!? Or indeed of two shrinks, as their mother is a psychologist.) Anyway, our kids know what I mean. So, what does Dr Bryant teach us about how to savor? First we have to be mindful because if we are not consciously present in the moment we cannot begin to savor. Then there are three phases to any savoring experience. First, we have to anticipate. As soon as we know the good food is coming, start to imagine what it might be like. We need to ready ourselves for the taste sensation, i. e. we prepare ourselves to be mindful. Second, when it is in front of us, and as we eat it, adding to what was learned before, we should marvel at its features and give thanks for the