Okay
for
those
of
you
s?ll
reading
do
you
wanna
know
what
DOES
increase
happiness?
Researchers
say
people
finding
sa?sfac?on
from
things
like
autonomy
(making
our
own
choices),
authen?c
connec?on,
having
sa?sfying
rela?onships,
community,
contribu?ng
and
being
helpful
in
ways
that
have
meaning
to
us
and
the
world
at
large,
a
focus
on
FEELING
healthy,
cul?va?ng
more
compassionate
ways
of
self-‐acceptance,
crea?vity,
personal
growth
and
experiencing
all
sorts
of
stuff
that
does
not
require
the
outside
approval
of
others.
That
last
bit
seems
like
a
lot
to
ask,
but
it
makes
sense
if
you
can
see
it
as
the
difference
between
reading
a
story
you
really
enjoy
instead
of
being
assigned
a
book
you’re
not
all
that
interested
in,
just
to
look
like
you’re
reading
what
everyone
else
is
reading.
One
goal
people
ogen
have
is
to
look
good
from
the
outside
to
feel
okay
on
the
inside.
We
really
seem
to
want
this,
but
the
real
need
is
usually
belonging.
The
thing
about
belonging
is-‐-‐
it
just
doesn’t
come
from
the
crowd.
It
comes
from
the
stuff
up
there
I
just
men?oned.
It
sure
feels
nice
to
look
well
and
take
care
of
ourselves
and
yet
it
can
get
out
of
balance.
What
we
know
is
that
the
experience
of
well-‐being
comes
from
within
you.
At
?mes
when
we
are
finding
our
iden?ty
(12-‐18
years
old)
we
need
belonging
more
than
ever
and
it
is
easy
to
get
confused
about
this
stuff!
So
I
will
add
their
exact
words.
Tim
Kasser
Ph.D
and
Richard
Ryan
Ph.D,
describe
intrinsic
as
“the
sense
of
being
inherently
valuable
or
sa?sfying
to
the
individual,
rather
than
being
dependent
on
the
con?ngent
evalua?ons
of
others.”)
This
has
preXy
big
implica?ons
in
many
areas
but,
let’s
look
at
one
typical
(well
inten?oned)
goal
that
makes
most
people
unhappy
in
long
term
outcomes.
Then
we
can
look
at
the
same
goal
again
with
an
imaginary
intrinsic
wand
waved
over
it.
+
Your!
Body
=
a perfect beach
body.
I
hear
this
one
every
year
when
bathing
suit
season
rolls
around.
I
want
to
lose
X
number
of
pounds
to
look
beXer
in
a
swimsuit.
I
am
going
on
XYZ
new
diet
craze
or
doing
this
cleanse
that
“finally
works”.
(Hint:
If
diets
worked
or
we
probably
wouldn’t
need
to
keep
doing
them.)
People
say
“I
want
XYZ
name
brand
ouOit
to
look
good
in
front
of
XYZ
hip
people
at
XYZ
important
place
so
I
can
be
no?ced,
admired
by
ABCDEFG….
Everybody
or
one
special
somebody”.
Okay
maybe
this
is
not
you
at
all,
but
if
you
see
parts
of
yourself
here
it’s
totally
normal;
it
is
just
not
so
helpful
if
you
want
happiness.
I
came
up
with
some
ques?ons
you
might
want
to
ask
yourself
about
the
focus
of
your
goals.