my many civilian journeys into the Jungle . Most of the time , he would chuckle , say , ‘ Yeah , that ’ s a classic ,’ and end with , ‘ But that ’ s another one that will get you fired if management heard it !’”
WHAT ’ S IN A NAME ? If you took a cruise into the Jungle in the late 2000s , you might have been guided by Janosko . But you probably won ’ t remember him as just plain Ian .
“ I don ’ t know how it is today , but in my time , any Skipper worth his salt had a Skipper Name ,” Janosko shared . “ Some came up with their own ( John ‘ Henselmonster ,’ ‘ Cactus ’ Jack , ‘ Random ’ Randal , and Kristin ‘ Kicks ’ for example ), but some would be conferred this honor by their trainer .”
And Janosko ? Just call him “ Right Guard Ian .” That Skipper Name was handed to him by his own trainer , Triple B ( Bobb ), who said Ian ’ s voice reminded him of an ad for Right Guard deodorant sticks . “ I proudly go by that to this very day ,” Right Guard Ian shared , “ much to the surprise of Triple B , who never expected the name to … stick …”
their boat rock slightly , turn to see what caused it , and come face to face with a gorilla ! After their scream of terror , Metal Steve would remove the gorilla mask from the rest of the costume , laugh , and say , ‘ Welcome to the Jungle !’
“ Only recently did I begin to wonder if one night , he may have misjudged these shenanigans and come out of the darkness to find a boat filled with passengers , only to make a hasty retreat !” That sure would explain the collective memory of an unwelcome King Louis aboard Jungle Cruise . “ I must remember to ask Steve someday !”
MAKE ‘ EM LAUGH The hardest part of being a Jungle Cruise Skipper ? Janosko said it ’ s “ those boats where nothing you do gets a laugh and still plowing through the cruise , giving 1,000 % and hoping for the laughs that never come .”
You heard it here , folks : Jungle Cruise Skippers bust their backsides ( of water ?) every day to bring you those laughs that Marc Davis once realized were so important . So do them a favor and laugh at their jokes , even if you are feeling shy and don ’ t like to laugh in groups of strangers . Trust me , your loyal Skippers will appreciate it .
AN ACCIDENTAL KING LOUIS Given that WDW has been a part of Janosko ’ s life since he was an infant — and since he spent two years as a Skipper — I had to ask if he knew of any Imagineering details or hidden Mickeys on Jungle Cruise that the internet had not yet uncovered . And what a tale he shared .
“ There is a Mandela effect associated with Jungle Cruise ,” Janosko told me . “ Someone on a Disney chat group swore adamantly that he recalled the Ancient Cambodian Shrine ”— which Janosko dutifully pointed out was built to honor Goddess Shir-Lee , making the shrine the Shir-Lee Temple —“ was where King Louis of The Jungle Book appeared … and the temple crumbled around as you exited it . Several people claimed to remember this actually being an effect in the ride , which , of course , it never was .
“ However , after I got to the Jungle , I met my friend ‘ Metal ’ Steve , a Skipper fond of heavy metal , who would perform a unique welcome to new Skippers in the Jungle ,” Janosko continued . Late at night , when lines were empty , a Skipper might have to guide a “ dead boat ” ( empty trip ) so passengers out on the river could return to the dock . “ When a fresh-outof-training Skipper got one of these and ... would go into the nearly pitch-black temple , halfway through , they would feel
There is no telling where this temple may end , but this is Disney , so it ’ s probably a gift shop . PHOTO BY CLIFF WANG