TOP LEADERS
To reverse course, you must tap
into Conversational Intelligence,
a framework for knowing which
conversations trigger different
brain activities for constructive
communication. Research has shown
that engaging conversations trigger
the brain’s prefrontal cortex, a section
that enables trust and good judgement,
reducing fears and threats. This opens
the door to more innovative and
creative results with others, now and
in the future. When people co-create,
they feel ownership for the results; they
feel more accountable, they are willing
to work harder to bring the ideas to
fruition and they produce higher levels
of productivity at work. Through co-
creating conversations, we can connect
with others in healthy and productive
ways, something vital for
mutual success.
Leaders looking for their next step
would do well to remember the word
“aspire” has a Latin root: “to breathe.” To
achieve more, ideas need to flow freely
and to fuel us. We can then breathe in
a coherent, collaborative way, we aspire
together, and our capabilities increase.
To ensure you’re engaging in co-
creating conversations, apply these
four tips.
1. WHEN YOU MEET SOMEONE
NEW. Say, “I’m so glad I met you!” Or
“You look familiar!” Our brains are
designed to be social. The need to
belong is more powerful than the need
for safety. Feeling rejected activates our
fear networks and increases the level of
cortisol, which moves us into protective
behaviors. A sense of inclusion
reduces protective cortisol levels while
increasing oxytocin and
promoting bonding.
2. WHEN YOU BRAINSTORM WITH
A DIVERSE GROUP. Say, “thank you”
or “That’s a great point.” Reaching
out to connect and appreciate others’
perspectives, even if you don’t agree,
elevates trust, or feeling like a friend,
thus creating a larger framework
for thinking together. Make sure
to appreciate others’ contributions,
comment on how their idea has helped
you, and let them know how much you
appreciate their thinking. Appreciation
reshapes our neural networks, activating
a larger framework of neurons in our
brain that enables higher levels of seeing,
hearing, and thinking broader
and bigger.
3. WHEN YOU WANT TO PERSUADE
SOMEONE. Say nothing – at first.
Put yourself in your listener’s shoes.
Empathy activates the mirror neuron
network located in the prefrontal
cortex or Executive Brain. When we
mirror each other, we can see and
experience the world through each
other’s eyes. This activates higher
oxytocin production, which facilitates
bonding, collaboration and co-creation,
and elevates trust and openness. We
become comfortable sharing what is
really on our minds.
4. WHEN YOU NEED TO SOLVE A
DIFFICULT PROBLEM. Say, “Tell me
your thoughts,” and listen to connect.
When we are uncertain, both the
distrust and trust networks are activated
at the same time. We more easily fall
into groupthink to be safe in the crowd,
or we close up for fear we will look
weak. Make it safe to be transparent
about what you are uncertain about.
Don’t penalize those who speak up –
encourage them to share. Conversational
Intelligence is the ability to master the
power of connection to enhance your
relationships and gain better business
and personal results.
REMEMBER,
CONVERSATIONAL
INTELLIGENCE HELPS
YOU BECOME SMARTER
AT NAVIGATING YOUR
SOCIAL HIGHWAY.
IT’S NOT ABOUT HOW
SMART YOU ARE, BUT
HOW OPEN YOU ARE TO
LEARNING EFFECTIVE
CONVERSATIONAL
RITUALS THAT PRIME
THE BRAIN FOR TRUST,
PARTNERSHIP, AND
MUTUAL SUCCESS.
ENTREPRENEURS WHO
PUT RELATIONSHIPS
BEFORE TASKS CAN
BUILD BRIDGES FOR
CONNECTION THAT
LEAD TO REAL
GREATNESS.
Judith E. Glaser was an Organizational Anthropologist. She was one of the most
pioneering and innovative change agents, consultants and executive coaches, in
the consulting and coaching industry and was the world’s leading authority on
Conversational Intelligence®, WE-centric Leadership, and Neuro-Innovation, and was
a best-selling author of 7 business books including her newest bestseller - Conversational
Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results. Through
the application of ‘the neuroscience of we’ to business challenges, Judith showed CEOs
and their teams how to elevate levels of engagement, collaboration, and innovation to
positively impact the bottom line.
Judith passed away on November 18th, 2018 after a long battle with cancer.
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