COMMUNICATION
TALKING TO CHILDREN ABOUT WAR
Children mayfeel confusedand scared overthe recentinvasionof Ukraine by Russia . Such feelings arenormal but providing support andthe rightkind of information can helpour children to feel moresecure . According to ChristopherLynch , PhD , psychologist and director of Pediatric Behavioral Medicine for Goryeb Children ’ s Hospital , “ Children benefit from honest explanations about whatishappening but those explanationsmust be tailored tothe age and developmentallevel of the child .”
Dr . Lynchofferssome general guidelinestofollowwhentalking with your children about the ongoing invasion :
1 . Be honestwith thefacts of the situation . Childrencan oftentellwhen parents areleaving out or glossing over importantdetails . Ifyou do not provide themwiththe facts , they may imagine the situation inaccurately and think that their own safetyisinjeopardy .
2 . Provide information at an ageappropriate level . Behonest with your children but use words andconcepts that your childrencan understand . Asking your child to repeatback what they heard you say can helpidentify anyneed for clarification .
3 . Reassure your child that they are safe . Children needtoknow that the adults in their world are in control and know what to do to keep them safe . In thecaseofthisconflict , childrenmay need to understand that the invasion is far away and that they are wellprotected fromit .
4 . Acttohelp in any way that you can . Children can feelmorecontrol over asituation if they can help in some way . Yourchildmay wanttodonate items , or part of theirallowance , maybe they wanttomake up acard or banner for
Ukrainian children . Any of these gestures will teachyourchildrencompassion and help them to makeadifference .
5 . Monitor media exposure and limitwhen necessary . There are many disturbing imagesthatare being displayed throughtelevision and other formsof media . Theseimages may be too disturbing for children to process . Find out from yourchildren wherethey are getting theirinformation fromsothatyou can clarify or limitwhennecessary .
Everyone , including children , haveat least some awareness of what is happening . Dr . Lynch saysparents can proactively start a dialogue with their children to assess their thoughts and feelings on thetopic .
“ Talkingtoyour children about the invasion will show them thatitisOKto talk about difficult feelings and that we are theretohelpthem ,” he says .
PHOTO / GETTY IMAGES
Christopher Lynch , PhD , is part of Atlantic Medical Group , a multispecialty network of health care providers . For more information , visit atlanticmedicalgroup . org .
SPRING 2022 CHILTON MAGAZINE