Concern:
SHE LOOKS TO THE ONLINE
WORLD FOR VALIDATION,
WHICH CREATES ANXIETY
What helps:
LAY THE FOUNDATION FOR A
HEALTHY SENSE OF SELF-WORTH
It’s common for kids to compare themselves to friends online, a
practice that can lead to unnecessarily bad assumptions. “At
Stanford University, they call this the ‘Duck Syndrome,’” says Loretta
Bouchard, a licensed certified social worker in Lincoln Park. “On the
surface, things looks smooth, but under the water, the legs are
working frantically. What we see is not always the way things are.”
Upsetting messages and images can send kids’ moods spiraling
downward, detracting from not only their enjoyment of life, but
time that would be devoted to schoolwork. The best antidote,
says Bouchard, is to model self-esteem – talking about how work is
gratifying and how you think you made a difference, for example,
instead of commenting on how much weight you need to lose.
“When you’re at the dinner table or in their rooms before they go to
sleep, praise smart and caring things your kids have done,” she says.
“Ask about the highlights and struggles of their day.”
Concern:
SOCIAL MEDIA MOVES SO FAST THAT IT’S SHORTENING
MY CHILD’S ATTENTION SPAN
What helps:
TEACHING THEM HOW TO SLOW DOWN
Since social media is interactive and information comes in fast snip-
pets, educators and parents are giving a lot of thought to how kids
can slow down their minds and bodies, and focus enough to absorb
longer reading materials and complex lessons. They also want to
help students combat the anxiety that comes from worrying about
social status. When kids need to calm down, they can practice the
same activities that slow and relax adults – mindfulness meditation,
yoga and sports – which offer the added bonus of raising healthy
endorphin levels. Any activity that requires a singular focus – playing
with puzzles, board games and cards – slows down the body and
mind. Other tips: Avoiding screens first thing in the morning allows
children to get up to speed gradually before entering the fast-paced
world of social media. Similarly, “A half-hour before bedtime,
devices need to go back to mom and dad,” Neuscheler says. “Some
kids will be on them all night long, and sleep with them under their
pillows. Their brains are going like crazy, and they need to sleep.”
Concern:
THEY THINK I HATE ALL SOCIAL MEDIA
What helps:
GETTING TO KNOW WHAT’S OUT THERE
You know that social media can be a force for good. Peers can help with
research and share real-time feedback. Multi-player games, such as
Minecraft, in which players build constructions out of textured cubes,
teach spatial relations while fostering friendships. Here’s a challenge: The
more you familiarize yourself with this part of their world, the more your
kids will see you as someone who knows what she’s talking about. ■
WAYNE MAGAZINE BACK TO SCHOOL 2017
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