5
Goats and Taxicabs
Tobler’s first law states that “Everything is relat-
ed to everything else.” So the question should
be asked: how are goats and taxicabs even re-
motely related? Let’s start off with the fact that
goats do a lot of weird things. One of the more
interesting actions that goats perform is their
vibrant jumping. Go on YouTube. I can assure
you that there are tons of videos that depict
goats just jumping around. I know in one vid-
eo, one particularly energetic goat is jumping
around and after a rather high vertical leap,
lands on one of its fellow goats, bounces off of
it, and does a flip. It’s pretty cool; but enough
about goats and their springiness. The point is,
goats jump a lot. Now take the word “taxicab”.
It can be broken down into the two words “taxi”
and “cab”. Using your nearest English diction-
ary, you can find out that “taxi” comes from the
Latin word taxa, meaning “tax” or “charge”.
Taxi is derived from this Latin word because of
the fact that taxicabs charge fares for taking
people across certain distances. But that has
nothing to do with goats. On the other hand,
“cab” has everything to do with goats. “Cab” is
actually short for “cabriolet”, a fancy French
word for a light, two-wheeled carriage driven by
a single horse. Well, studies show that a horse
isn’t a goat. Where is the connection?
“Cabriolet” is actually derived from the Latin
word “caper”, which means “goat”. Well, that
may be the case, but how did we go from a goat
to a carriage? If we look at the word “cabriolet”
from a different point of view, in the 19 th centu-
ry, more rudimentary cabriolets would pop up
and down if there were bumps in the road. It
wasn’t fun for the riders of the carriage, but on-
lookers thought this springing and jumping
movement appeared playful and entertaining to
watch. And who else is playful, entertaining,
and tends to jump a lot? Goats.
-Tino Delamerced: 1st VP
George Washington: An
American Romulus
The figure known to history as Romulus is more
myth than history. He was born a child of Mars,
raised by a wolf, founded Rome, created virtually
every aspect of Roman government, founded several
dozen priesthoods, organized the military, and be-
came a god. However, he was treated by the Ro-
mans as a real, historical figure. This may seem
absurd to modern observers. How could they actual-
ly believe that he was raised by a wolf, or that he
became a god? And how could they actually believe
that he was responsible for virtually every aspect of
Roman government, religion, military, and culture?
However, let us consider a more recent example
from American history. George Washington was in-
arguably an important figure in American history.
However, for many people, Washington has become
a figure very much like Romulus. He has overshad-
owed all the other founding fathers. When people
think of an event that happened at the dawn of our
country, they typically attribute is to Washington.
Many Americans would attribute the Constitution,
the Declaration of Independence, the Bill of Rights,
and the entire Revolutionary War solely to Washing-
ton. How different is this from the Romans’ believes
about Romulus? Washington Irving, named after
the first president, has written legends about Wash-
ington’s upbringing little more reasonable than
Romulus being raised by a wolf. A legend about
Washington cutting down his father’s cherry tree,
and later admitting it because he “cannot tell a lie”
has become a historical fact in the minds of many.
Some may respond that Washington was never de-
clared a god; however, what is the painting on the
dome of the capitol building, one of the oldest and
best known symbols of American government? It’s
the apotheosis of Washington, a painting of Wash-
ington literally becoming a god. If Washington can
attain such a legendary status in a mere two-
hundred years, why should it be surprising that
Romulus is a legendary figure after two-thousand?
And Washington is hardly alone in becoming a leg-
endary figure. Will historians one day look back
and wonder how we could possibly believe that Lin-
coln hunted vampires? As a society, we prefer not
to learn the facts of history, but interesting stories
and good propaganda. Romulus and Washington
both demonstrate this fact.
-Carter Hall: Publicity Coordinator