Volume 68, Issue 4 | Page 14

MOTHERS IN MEDICINE (continued from page 11) the two boys who first made me a mother. While I did not enter motherhood in the traditional sense that many envision, all three boys are very much ours and very much loved. As a young mother and new physician, I was naïve on two fronts. First, I incorrectly believed I could compartmentalize to be a doctor only at the hospital and only a mom at home. I learned very quickly that, despite hitting the lottery by having a husband who cooked, cleaned and taxied, I was everything in all spaces. I was still mom when I was in the ICU caring for other people’s children. When I was at home, my work never fully stayed at the hospital. While at the hospital, regardless of the circumstances, I am still mom. Last month, I paused rounds, called home and grounded one of my now teenagers from his cell phone while his father was on phone conferences. I was both mom and Dr. Henderson simultaneously. Secondly, I was naïve to think I knew how to parent young Black men in America. Parenting Tedi and Chernet, both born in Africa but raised in America, to be strong, proud and kind Black men - in the face of a culture that views them as scary, menacing, risky and less than - has been the greatest burden of my life. I say this as a white woman with the privilege of seeing my sons’ experiences and realizing I will never fully grasp what Black mothers and fathers have felt for generations. Leaning on my own personal experience is not an accurate reflection of the life they are walking through. My white-washed struggles pale in comparison to being told not to wear a hoodie when walking to the YMCA, not being allowed to play with toy guns or being accused of property destruction because of their skin color (all of these things have happened in their short lives). Being their mother has spurred within me the desire to protect them, to advocate for them and to fight to destroy the racism they, and so many others, face. My journey as a mother and physician has not been one of ease, simplicity or tradition. Like all working parents, we currently find ourselves navigating a pandemic with three school-age children. We both have busy careers with my husband working as the Communications Director for the Lieutenant Governor of Kentucky, and I am at Norton Children’s Hospital in the Cardiovascular Intensive Care Unit. Our boys continue to make me a much better doctor. Similarly, the patients I care for make me a stronger, more loving mother. If there is anything to be gleaned from my journey it is this: life may not always evolve the way you envisioned but adapting, growing, advocating, loving and realizing we belong to one another is a worthy pursuit. Dr. Henderson practices pediatric and cardiac critical care medicine at Norton Children’s Hospital. 12 LOUISVILLE MEDICINE