MOMS, STOP
LET THEM
FAIL!
than
plan than you think!
"Are you enabling your children?"
As women, I think we feel an extra burden of responsibility to make our homes a happy one. We try to be everything to everyone. A nurturer to our children, a lover to our husbands, and a homemaker to anyone who enters our door. To that, add care-taker of the sick, checker of the homework and coordinator of all holidays, birthday parties and other social events. With all that responsibility (self-inflicted or otherwise) disappointments are sure to arise. Linda Carter may have had a truth inducing lasso and a flying tiara, but I assure you she was the only true wonder woman there ever was. We can't do it all and we know it. But when we try and fail, we're devastated. Especially when our children feel the consequences.
When your daughter fails a big test, your son's uniform isn’t clean for the game or both kids get peanut butter and jelly at school for lunch because they're out of money, who takes the blame?
You may say to yourself, “Well it's my kid’s job to study, make sure their
uniform is clean and tell me if they're
out of lunch money.” And you're right - it is. But when they fail, do you blame yourself? Do you think, "Well I know they can do it, but I should have checked to make sure?"
"our responsibility changes from one who does, to one who equips . . . "
I find myself taking part of the responsibility for things my children should shoulder way too often. Even when I look them straight in the eye and say, "I'm not in middle school anymore, you are!" Or, "It's your name on that report card, not mine!" Or, my personal favorite, “You better spray some Febreze on that uniform and keep it moving!" There's still a little part of me that feels like I should have taken care of it. But should I? Could I have done something more or should I have done something more?
Should implies that there was something I should have taken care of that I didn't. It implies that something was my responsibility, when in reality there wasn't. When our kids get to a certain age, the responsibility for homework and
10