VIEWPOINT MAGAZINE Volume 2.3 March 2014 | Page 18

The Belittlement
of Passion

By Mary Smith

“Me? I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of what I saw, I’m scared of what I did, of who I am, and most

of all I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I’m
with you.” A quote from the movie Dirty Dancing. An old quote but, I feel, still manages to capture the general
attitude that movies nowadays hold towards romantic love. I see it in almost everything I watch. It doesn’t matter
if it’s an action show Wolverine or some chick flick, they always have to include some sort of love story. In
themselves, many of these stories are harmless and entertaining, but it becomes unhealthy when romantic love
becomes overwhelmingly idealized in everything we watch—as it becomes a way to entertain needy people, the
real virtues of love get pushed to the side and overshadowed by more trivial features. Thus, love is reduced to a
quality of little substance.
Love has been downgraded to a feeling. The passion itself is the most shallow, insubstantial part of
relationships and yet a part that has become glorified. Actions are done out of plain infatuation, not from any
deeper, more noble qualities, and when these actions are done in the name of love, such self-sacrifice and humility
lose their meanings. Apparently the most noble human attribute is romantic affection because we are now
incapable of seeking a deeper purpose.

“Love has been downgraded to a feeling. The passion itself is the most
shallow, insubstantial part of relationships and yet a part that has
become glorified.”
In the promotion of passion, romantic relationships come to be portrayed as a kind of epitome of human
existence, something to be sought above all else, the place in which one finds the highest joy, status, and, most of
all, worth. However, it remains a sad distortion of the truth. Nobody should be defined by either being, or not
being, the object of someone else’s admiration. The worth and refinement of the human spirit should be sought
in areas much more estimable than another’s hormones, waiting to be fulfilled by someone’s importance to
another person. People have such a huge capacity for love, but when we are guided to believe that love comes
down to the kind of romance and affection we watch, this ability is devalued. Thus, our expectation of love is
distorted. It becomes aimed at an ideal we believe is important, but which actually has little to no value in itself.
The idea that we will be happy and perfected by a romantic relationship is an exaggeration made by people who
wish to sell more movies. Love in movies is conditional love—conditional upon the way someone feels, upon
one’s ability to maintain that feeling, but love shouldn’t be conditional. That takes away from the very essence of
love—the forgetting of self. Love shouldn’t depend on anything, it needs to be refined in and of itself. We are
confusing love with something more superficial. When we resolve to settle for love that goes no deeper than
feelings we can mislead ourselves into thinking that is all the kind of love we need show others, even beyond
romantic sentiment, into thinking things like, “I will only show love to you if you aren’t annoying,” Love should
be much purer than what we currently possess. It is something that should be found in selfless actions and
tenderness in the love of God which teaches humility, sacrifice, and faithfulness. Seek the kind of love that you
are worthy of—worthy of having and capable of giving.
Disclaimer: Opinions expressed in this page do not, in any way, represent the school’s opinion. These are owned and
freely expressed by the individuals per se.

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