8
her. 14 Joseph added that he was‘ accustomed to pay a Deference to their opinion, which is always founded in reason”, a Unitarian characteristic. Combined with his clear love of Isabella this created a dilemma for Joseph’ s course of action. If Joseph continued to be seen with Isabella it would be unacceptable to his friends, it risked causing them uneasiness. On the other hand not seeing her intimated a‘ neglect’ that he understood was difficult for her to defend to her friends and which was not meant. 15 This effectively positions social tension in the under-lying fervour where cross-religious relationships were fraught with danger in striving to achieve permanent movement across faiths.
Later Joseph emphasised that his behaviour did not normally cause his friends anxiety but that in his relationship with Isabella he had no doubt of their dissatisfaction, and at that time would rather‘ bear their silent disapprobation, than their avowed censure of my choice’. 16 Joseph debated that he was not‘ wholly swayed by the opinion of others’ and yet‘ nor shall I at present attempt to alter their opinion’, combined with‘ I love you too well & esteem you too much to be drawn aside from my purpose’; it is as if Joseph was thinking aloud in his letter, and was certainly at that time not prepared to commit himself to a particular course of action. 17 Joseph suffers discomfort for his choice of partner in both his private and public arenas. In January 1789 Joseph is perturbed to hear from friends, following an absence of correspondence from Isabella since October 1788 that he has‘ broken off my engagement with [ Isabella ]’ and it had become the subject of common knowledge and gossip. 18 If true, this would have been regarded as a serious breach of obligation resulting in a tarnished reputation and would have affected both his personal and business relationships. Joseph places the instigation of the rumours with Isabella as they contain information on his sister that he has not mentioned to anyone else. 19 Censure of a person’ s conduct could attract public attention within and across separate faith communities. Joseph’ s letters show a trail of coercion and manipulation by him towards Isabella on her public conduct which he and his community found wanting. They also encapsulate
14
Ibid.
15
Ibid.
16
Letter from Joseph to Isabella, 26 th October 1788( BAHPS MS3101 / C / E / 4 / 8 / 14).
17
Letter from Joseph to Isabella, 26 th October 1788( BAHPS MS3101 / C / E / 4 / 8 / 14).
18
Letter from Joseph to Isabella, 7 th January 1789( BAHPS MS3101 / C / E / 4 / 8 / 16).
19
Letter from Joseph to Isabella, 26 th January 1789( BAHPS MS3101 / C / E / 4 / 8 / 17).