TRANSITIONS | Page 13

Parents who are involved in a divorce with conflict are going to have a very hard time of understanding exactly how their young children truly are feeling. That is not necessarily the case when parents have teenage children. Teenagers do not exist to please their parents. They have their own identities, their own wants and needs. Parents are shocked that their teenagers now have become distant or seem consumed with nothing but hate. The way we see it, many children, regardless of their age, are going to be angry when their parent’s divorce. Many children, regardless of age, are going to feel sad and hopeless. Divorce is a life altering event that is hard to understand and comprehend. Kids need to know that they have the ability to express themselves. Kids need their parents help to become resilient in the face of the sudden changes that the divorce has caused. If children are not allowed to transition through the divorce process they will have problems. In the short term it might mean uncontrolled outbursts of anger. In the long term the child may face depression, anxiety or even worse. So when you see that child's smiling face, dig a little deeper. Don't just ask, interact. You know you are going through a major change in your life, know that your kids are too. For more information, visit us at www.kidsfirstparentssecond.org.