record player. With trembling hands you put the needle to the record
and the music began to play: “ Smile even though you’re
aching…smile though your heart is breaking…although a tear is ever
so near….if.. you…smile…through your tears and sorrow-smile
there will be tomorrow.” At that moment we both knew- there
would be no tomorrow.
You stood frozen like a statue as you looked at me. You just knew.
As I closed my eyes for the last time I took you in my arms and we
began to dance. The floor began to disappear as our feet left the
ground. I felt such peace-like a warm blanket was wrapped around
my shoulders. I could feel your gentle spirit envelope my heart forever. I know a part of you left with me. I can’t really explain it but I
knew the familiar feeling-the comfort-the love. You had given me my
last wish- a dance with my sweetie- if only in my dreams.
Quite a few years have past but you still go to my grave and play
“Smile.” Of course, it is now with a portable CD player- but it is
still the same song! Sweet girl please hear me: I pray you go on with
your life. Dancing with a dream is only that-a dream. I loved you
with all of my heart-now you have to love me enough to let me go.
swayed as the words guided our steps; “Smile though your heart is
aching…smile even though it’s breaking...although a tear may be ever
so near…” Whew - what a song. From that moment on it became
our song. It was like we had always danced together. One, two,
three…swaying , dancing- falling into each other arms. Oh my:
What a dance…what a love…what a life! What a darn shame! Why
does it have to end? Damn this cancer! Damn this cancer!
As I awoke I knew something was different . Usually I felt at
peace- but this time my heart was pounding in terror. My God,
where are you?! What's going on? Oh, NO! Not now- this can't be
happening! Please.. ..there’s not much time. Please come-it is time.
I need you. I need to feel you, to touch you- to smell the perfume in
your hair. I need to take a part of you with me- on me. Please
come…there is not much time.
As the sun streamed through my window my eyes opened one last
time to see the most beautiful face I had ever seen. Time had no
hold on you-you were as beautiful as the first day I saw you.
Somehow you knew it was time for me to go. As you dropped the
tray of tea and cookies and ran to my side, I will never forget the
sound of that gasp coming
straight out of your soul. Your
head rested on my chest as your
warm tears fell upon my hands.
I stroked your hair one last
time. Thank God- your perfume would escort me straight
into heaven.
As night began to fall I
pulled you close to my lips
and whispered “Smile.” You
became very still as you tried
to stand up. You always
knew what I wanted. I could
not say it but you knew-and
ran directly to the old
It is time for you to live. Don’t look back and grieve. Look ahead
with a grateful heart and know, to the depth of your soul, we will
meet again. I will be waiting for you-yes, with our favorite song
escorting you back into my arms.
Sweet girl-you were everything to me- now go on ݥѠ