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“Boy, it was hard
to breathe today.”
Sometimes I wonder if it is worth going on anymore. Then you
walk in the room and everything changes. There you are- smiling
that bright smile-bringing me ice tea and cookies…always taking
care of me.... always loving me. I can only hope you know how much
I love you. You are such a part of me-it is as though you have become
my life. When people begin completing each others sentences I
guess they have reached a point where they are simply one person.
The truth is- we reached that point the moment we met.
What a journey! We have learned to like the same food, the same
wine-we even learned to like the same old movies! And yes! I have to
tell the truth- I have cried a few tears sitting right next to you.
Remember the original Pink Panther movie? We had to hold onto
each other because we were laughing so hard. The Popcorn went
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flying across the room and we laughed till' we cried. We finally
collapsed together on the floor exhausted from picking up hundreds
of kernels from the carpet. Such a simple experience- with such a
profound effect. I guess there is just no real way to explain it ; love is
just love.
My only real concern is how I will go on without you and what
you will do without me. Death is really UN-fair. I am not afraid –
I just don’t want to leave you. It would be great if we could go
together: You know, dancing into heaven the way we danced on
earth? What a rush that would be! But alas, we all know life and
death are never fair. Sorry my love- I am getting really tired – time
to sign off for now. I think I will close my eyes and drift off into a
place of bliss…my memories of you.
As I slip into sleep I always have the same dream. I go back to
the first time I ever saw you. Remember that run down old dance
hall? Boy did we kick up some dust! I remember it just like it was
yesterday. I entered the front door with my high school buddies
as you bashfully entered with your girlfriends. Come on – you
remember: The giggling, the smiling- the blushing at the boys.
Well come to think of it, I take that back! I would like to believe you
ONLY looked at me! Dear one, I will leave this earth believing that
was true.
Oh, you beautiful girl- I knew you were the one the first minute
I saw you. It was your smile then and it is your smile now. I walked
across the dance hall and looked into those big green eyes and knew
instantly: This was it- this was forever.
Remember that old song “Smile?” That was our first dance. We