BY SOHAIL KHAN
NETWORKING:
COLUMN - Business Development
Think back to a moment when you were talking to someone who was really listening. You knew this person wasn’t just half listening. You knew he/she wasn’t thinking of something else when listening to you. You had the feeling that his/her total focus and concentration was squarley on the words coming out of your mouth. You just knew that he/she was listening 100%.
What Did You Do In That Situation?
Did you not release a torrent of information? Were you not excited at this rare opportunity to talk with someone who was truly listening? Did you not open the floodgates of your knowledge to this person? Were you not flattered that this person was giving his/her total undivided attention to you? Did you not feel closer to this person afterwards? Did you not feel compelled to give this person more information in the future?
Absolutely.
I’ve been in this situation before and each and every time I unloaded torrents of information was when, and only when, I knew the other person was listening 100%.
I’ve also been on the other side as well, listening intently to the people around me and their answers to the questions in the previous paragraphs were all yes as well. How do I know? Because they told me afterwards.
Listening effectively is one of the few skills out there that reaps huge returns, IF and only if, one takes the time to invest in learning how to do it.
So How Can We Become Great Listeners?
Develop a desire to truly listen. Every human being is a walking encyclopedia of not only information, but of real life experiences that you just can’t get from books. When people speak of their experiences, they color them with emotion and vigor, those of which cannot be conveyed to you from reading text alone. As a result, what they tell you may have a profound impact on you and your life from that moment on.
Not only do you learn about the information and real life experiences the other person conveys to you, you also learn about the other person. You learn his/her viewpoints in life, how he/she perceives things, what his/her likes and dislikes are, etc. Knowledge which can aid you in the future.
I like to think of listening to people as getting an education in "street smarts", because if you think about it, some of the most valuable information we get from listening to other people is not necessarily taught in the classroom. I’m reminded of a saying that goes something like "You can learn more from sitting across the table from a wise man in one hour, than you can from a year of reading great books."
46 | TRAINING MAGAZINE MIDDLE EAST SEPT 2014
the ART OF LISTENING