One morning , three Rednecks and three Politicians were in a ticket line at a train station . The three Politicians each bought a ticket and watched as the three Rednecks bought just one ticket .
“ How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket ?” asked one of the Politicians .
“ Watch and learn ,” answered one rednecks . All six boarded the train where the three Politicians sat down , but the three Rednecks crammed into a toilet together and closed the door .
Shortly after the train departed , the conductor came around to collect tickets . He knocked on the toilet door and said , “ Ticket , please .”
The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand . The conductor took it and moved on .
The Politicians saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea . Indeed , so clever they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save some money .
That afternoon when they got back to the station , they bought a single ticket for the return trip and watched , while to their astonishment , the three Rednecks didn ’ t buy even one ticket .
“ How are you going to travel without a ticket ?” asked one of the perplexed Politicians .
“ Watch and learn ,” answered the three West Virginia boys in unison .
When they boarded the train , the three Politicians crammed themselves into a toilet and the three Rednecks crammed into another toilet just down the way . Shortly after the train began to move , one of the Rednecks left their toilet and walked over to the toilet in which the Politicians were hiding . The Redneck knocked on the door and said , “ Ticket , please ”. Little Johnny came down for breakfast one morning and asked his Grandma , “ Where ’ s Mom and Dad ?” and she replied , “ They ’ re still up in bed .” Little Johnny giggled and left . He came back in for lunch and asked “ Where ’ s Mom and Dad ?” and Grandma gave the same reply . Again he giggled and left . Then he came in for dinner and once again he asked his Grandma , “ Where ’ s Mom and Dad ?” and his Grandmother replied , “ Gracious , they ’ re still up in bed !” Little Johnny started to laugh and his Grandmother asked , “ What gives ? Every time I tell you they ’ re still up in bed you start to laugh ! What is going on here ?” Little Johnny replied , “ Well , last night Daddy came into my bedroom and asked me for the Vaseline and I gave him my jar of super glue for my model airplanes by mistake .” --------------------------------------------------------------- Several years ago , a very rich business owner was having an affair with a beautiful young Italian woman . She told him that she was pregnant . He had all this confirmed by his private Doctor . He did not want the scandal of a divorce nor wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage , he said he would pay her a large sum of money if she would just stay in Italy to secretly have and raise the child .
He would also buy her a small but quaint 2 bedroom cottage . She agreed , but asked how he would know when the baby was born ..
To keep it discreet , he told her to simply mail him a post card , and write ‘ Spaghetti ’ on the back . He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin every month .
One day , about 9 months later , he came home to his confused wife . ‘ Honey , she said , ‘ you received a very strange post card today .’
‘ Oh , just give it to me and I ’ ll explain it later ,’ he said . The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card , turned white , and fainted .
On the card was written : Spaghetti , Spaghetti , Spaghetti , Spaghetti . Two with meatballs , two without . Send Extra Sauce NOW !!!!