Two guys left the bar after a long night of drinking,
jumped in the car and started it up. After a couple of
minutes, an old man appeared in the passenger window
and tapped lightly. The passenger screamed, “Look at he
window. There’s an old ghost’s face there!”
The driver sped up, but the old man’s face stayed in the
window. The passenger rolled his window down part way
and, scared out of his wits, said, “What do you want?”
The old man softly replied, “You got any tobacco?” The
passenger handed the old man a cigarette and yelled,
“Step on it,” to the driver, rolling up the window in terror.
A few minutes later they calmed down and started laughing again.The driver said, “I don’t know what happened,
but don’t worry; the speedometer says we’re doing 80
now. ”All of a sudden there was a light tapping on the
window and the old man reappeared. “There he is again,”
the passenger yelled. He rolled down the window and
shakily said, “Yes?” “Do you have a light?” the old man
quietly asked.
The passenger threw a lighter out the window saying,
“Step on it!”They were driving about 100 miles an hour,
trying to forget what they had just seen and heard, when
all of a sudden there came some more tapping.
“Oh my God! He’s back!” The passenger rolled down the
window and screamed in stark terror, “WHAT NOW?” The
old man gently replied, “You guys want some help getting out of the mud?”
A couple, both age 78, went to a sex therapist’s office.
The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?”
The man said, “Will you watch us have sex?”
The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.
When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s
nothing wrong with the way you have sex,” and charged
them $50.
This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would
make an appointment, have sex with no problems, pay
the doctor, then leave.
Finally, the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?”
“We’re not trying to find out anything,” the man replied.
“She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house.
The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We
do it here for $50...and I get $43 back from Medicare.
This Halloween I met a genuine Fairy that said she would
grant me one wish.
“I want to live forever,” I said.
“Sorry,” said the Fairy, “I’m not allowed to grant wishes
like that!”
“Fine,” I said, “then I want to die after Congress gets
their heads out of their asses!”
“You crafty bastard,” said the Fairy.
On the night of a Halloween costume party a couple
were arguing, having trouble picking suitable outfits.
After a while the wife got mad and stormed out of the
room. Fifteen minutes later she came back completely
naked except for a lemon between her legs.
The husband looked at her for a moment and then
stormed out of the room himself. Twenty minutes passed
and then he stomped back in, completely naked, with a
potato around his penis.
The wife gave him a weird look, and the husband quickly
replied; “If you’re going as a Sour-Puss, I’m going as a
Dictator”.
www.thunderroadscolorado.com
October 2015
Thunder Roads Magazine® Colorado 33