On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to
playt ogether.
One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog and
began to sink.
Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken to go get the
farmer for help!
Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he
searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail, for he had
gone to town with the only tractor.
Running around, the chicken spied the farmer’s new Harley.
Finding the keys in the ignition, the chicken sped off with a length of
rope hoping he still had time to save his friend’s life.
Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the
chicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold
of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him.
After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the farmer’s bike,
the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of the
powerful bike, rescued the horse!
Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, and the farmer was none the wiser when he returned.
The friendship between the two animals was cemented: Best Buddies, Best Pals....For Life!
A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, and soon, he too,
began to sink and cried out to the horse to save his life!
The horse thought a moment, walked over, and straddled the
large puddle.
Looking underneath, he told the chicken to grab his hangy-down
thang and he would then lift him out of the pit.
The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him up and out,
saving his life.
The moral of the story? (yep, you betcha, there IS a moral!)
“When You’re Hung Like A Horse, You Don’t Need A Harley To
Pick Up Chicks.”
A redneck was stopped by a game warden in middle Tennessee
recently with two ice chests full of fish. He was leaving a secluded lake well known for its fishing.
The Game Warden asked the man, ‘Do you have a license to
catch those fish?’
‘Naw, sir’, replied the redneck. ‘I ain’t got none of them there licenses.
You gotta’ understand, these here are my pet fish.’
‘Pet fish?’
‘Yeah. Every night, I take these here fish down to the lake and let
‘em swim ‘round for a while. Then, when I whistle, they jump right
back into these here ice chests and I take ‘em on home.’
‘That’s a bunch of b.s.! Fish can’t do that.’
The redneck looked at the warden for a moment and then said,
‘It’s the truth Mr. Government Man. I’ll show ya, it truly works.’
‘O.K.’, said the warden. This I’ve got to see!’
The redneck poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After several minutes, the warden says, ‘Well?’
‘Well, what?,’ says the redneck.
The warden says, ‘When are you going to whistle them back?’
‘Whistle who back?’
‘The FISH,’! yelled the warden!
‘What fish?,’ replied the redneck, “I thought we were just beholdin’ the beauty of the lake.”
A biker who has been out on the road for three weeks stops into a
brothel outside Vegas.
He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, “I
want your ugliest woman you got in here and a bologna sandwich!!”
The Madam is astonished. “But sir, for that kind of money you could
have one of the finest ladies here and a three-course meal.”
Biker replies, “Listen sweetheart, I ain’t horny, I’m HOMESICK.”
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check
tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the
ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without
missing a beat....she said,
“Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.”
www.thunderroadscolorado.com
September 2015
Thunder Roads Magazine® Colorado 33