THRIVING Melanin Family Magazine November 2018 | Page 13

they are long gone. At the stroke of midnight,
we willingly release from our thoughts the
feeling of a child’s heart beat under the palm of
our hand, warm and innocent protected by the
strength of our experience. At the stroke of
midnight, we lose sight of the vision that is
seen in the midst of our dreams, where
monsters are banished and destinies unfold,
where heroes are formed and love is shown –
all in the words of a folk song.
We do not discount the fact that life
sometimes leaves us with scars and some
memories may be so full of pain that the
burden is hard to bare. We acknowledge that
forgetting, during traumatic times, seems the
best option and therefore a new year indicates
a chance at a new beginning.  But how much
better would our resolve be if we understood
that by replacing the negative emotions of
hurt, loss and pain with more positive emotions
of inner peace, joy and self-worth, that the
process would lead us to a place of healing and
learn our A B C’s and what are our A B C’s? They
are our Attitudes that bring us to awareness, our
Behaviors to prompt us to action and our
resulting positive Change. The use of this
particular concept to overcome the negative
impact of damaging situations or circumstance
is just one way to create a positive emotion.
 Changing the way we allow certain events,
people, situations and / or circumstances to
affect our happiness depends greatly on how
happy we choose to be.  
According to research conducted by the
National Institutes of Health, evidence shows
that people improve their psychological well-
being and possibly their overall physical health
through the effective use of positive emotional
therapy or as it is more commonly called
positive psychology.  By engaging in positive
emotions, coping skills are enhanced and
negative situations are resolved and that space
in memory is re-allocated to happier thoughts.
When it comes to days gone by and memories
of old, some acquaintances don’t necessarily
need to be forgotten, for they are lessons well
needing to be learned.  Teaching us of a truth
that is reminiscent of our own and allowing us a
space in which to heal.
forgiveness that brings us to the light that
brightens our reflection and allows us to sing a
different more uplifting song. Yes we want to
forget the pain, but remembering is part of the
healing process.
So, how do we remember the pain, relive the
trauma, redirect the emotion and brighten the
reflection in order to get to a place in our
minds, our spirits and our souls where happy is?
 We seek help.
With the assistance of a trained licensed
professional (counselor, psychologist,
psychiatrist, or behavioral therapist), we re-
To reflect on the experiences that life teaches
means that we grow from all that was and was
not meant for our good. Learning lessons of
respect and grace, lessons of honesty and faith,
lessons of strength and patience, lessons of time
and endurance.
So, the next time you gather with family and
friends to usher out the old and invite in the
new, think hard and long about what you have
accomplished during these last 365 days of
living and recall for yourself that which has
grown you, that which has healed you, that
which has renewed you and that which will
continue to encourage you and answer for
yourself “Should old acquaintance be forgot and
never brought to mind?”  and if you answer in
the affirmative, meaning that they should 
NOVEMBER
2018 • THRIVE | 11