She also speaks of family friend , Vaughn , who she believes “ knew my dissertation , I think more than I did . He used to sit by my bed , stay up with me while I ‘ burn the midnight oil ’ in preparation for my dissertation defense , and when I was going through my low moments , he was just always there for me . including preparing my meals for me . I have had some excellent supportive colleagues along the way .” This loyal commitment to her wellbeing was not just a love for her , but that she has also poured into them .
After revealing her Lupus diagnosis , many persons questioned why she hadn ’ t told them before . Recognizing the lack of value in sharing her diagnosis and asking what good that would do , Marsha calmly shares , “ I have my medical professionals , and I have a circle of people who are aware . When I ' m in my low moments , I can call them for support and say I need you now . I have proven that people really don ' t care , not about the stories or the complaining , especially when it becomes a burden . Complaining just crushes the spirit of the people around you .” She pointed out that each person has a cross to bear and she will carry hers with grace and gratitude . Besides , she explains , ‘ I didn ' t tell my story because I used to say , I don ' t have a story , I just need to keep myself quiet and be grateful .” Looking at other persons , those cancer survivors , even those with lupus who can hardly walk , and some who have sores on their skins , Marsha recognized that others face more significant challenges than she does .
Underscoring the importance of a support system , Dr . Smalling shares that her first job as a teacher at Warminster College Primary School was one of her most rewarding professional experiences because of the impact she was able to make with students there who were not performing at their capabilities . She made a difference in their lives , walking in the mornings to these students homes to get them out to school . When it was necessary , she would have them sleep over to adequately prepare them for competitions or exams .
She is delighted that after putting in that kind of effort , she is seeing those students as nurses , doctors , entrepreneurs , and professionals excelling in their fields . Marsha believes that such support needs to be reciprocated since when we pour into others , we create a better world . Still , she cautions that having the right people within your support system is essential , saying , “ people want you to do well , but they do not want you to do better than they are doing . ” Referencing our disappointment when others do not support us or do things to hold us back , she points out her consciousness , stating , “ I ' m not deterred by that . I acknowledge that you don ' t want me to go further , but I know what I want , and I will push , press , and persevere until I achieve my goals .”
LIVING A POWERED-UP LIFE
Dr . Smalling loves to pour into people . It is what gives her sheer joy and happiness . It is what makes her sleep peacefully at night . Offering nuggets of wisdom , she encourages us to live a powered life :
1 . Acknowledge that we were destined to be great and extraordinary human beings and to be audacious in our thinking .
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