The secret diary of a microdoser # 3
It all started with a Nordic Blond . She explained to me how the shamans in the north of her country , above the arctic circle , gave Fly Agaric mushrooms to the reindeer and then drank their urine . I felt my left eyebrow raise . The right one joined it shortly after .
We ’ re an odd species , aren ’ t we ? I pondered on how a human being might stumble across that one , what kind of story a shepherd would drum up as an excuse for arriving late for dinner . The perplexed expression on the face of his wife . Her husband looking more squiffy than usual , admitting it was all too intriguing , too tempting not to have a sip . A pattern began to form in my mind as I remembered Morocco and the revelation of how Argan oil is made . Fresh almond husks are “ passed through ” a goat ’ s digestive system which strips off the outer layers to reveal the gold inside , gold that is somewhat tarnished on exit , but brushes up well .
Human intrigue is the birth of invention . Mine led me to ask the question “ What is the difference between a reindeer ’ s gastric tract and a human ’ s ?” This triggered a familiar swell of hyperfocus which escalated through my torso and surged up my scalenes to become the tsunami of my mind . I had to know why the shamans chose this strategy to process the alkaloids of a psychedelic mushroom . Hundreds of hours of rabbit hole research followed . Minimal sleep . Many answers . But I can only give you the 7 inch version here .
The reason why fungi are regarded as an entirely separate kingdom by biologists is because the plant world is constructed with cellulose and the world of mushrooms is architected with chitin . When it comes to fungi , the difference between a reindeer ’ s digestive system and us humans is this : reindeer have a much higher level of chitinase , the enzyme specialises in breaking down the chitin cell wall . We have an abundance of cellulase in our bodies . Our level of chitinase however is minimal . The reindeers ’ stomachs can also handle the toxic compounds in Fly Agaric that would make us vomit , but I digress ...
When you dose on mushrooms , your body gives it its best shot , but it will unfortunately only absorb around 35 % of the psychedelic compounds they contain . The remaining percentage passes straight through . Sadly , your body is not very efficient at this game and , essentially , your money could go a lot further .
If you have taken mushrooms , you will recognise the warmth of the cuddle , be stunned by the visuals , some of you may well see aliens . However , before all that kicks in , many of you will experience another more uncomfortable emotion , erring on anxiety , a stage which you ’ re told by your friends to “ push through and you ’ ll be alright ”. I have found , through my own obsessive experimentation , that that unnerving feeling is also connected to the lack of chitinase in your body .
Now , you will find plenty on the web on how to make up for this shortfall , “ Lemon Tek ” tea being the most common . But you will not find what I ’ m about to tell you . In my research , I found that certain foods are particularly high in chitinase , for a completely different reason . They use chitinase as a defence mechanism for protecting their seeds against fungal pathogens and attacking insects ( whose exoskeletons also happen to be made with the same chitin building blocks ). Those foods include banana , avocado , chestnut and my two favourites : kiwifruit and papaya . Kiwifruit helps with the acidity . Papaya has wonderful anti-inflammatory properties , although avoid it if you are trying for a baby , it is an ancient contraceptive used in indigenous tribal medicine .
But I have different thoughts about the hot water element of Lemon Tekking . Us Brits do love serving up tea at boiling point , for some ungodly reason . However , something tells me that it distorts the psilocybin in the process . Because , when we cook anything , it physically changes , yes ? Why should that be different for naturally-occurring psychedelics ? I have found this cold enzymatic extraction method produces a cleaner high , that arrives quicker , and bypasses the anxiety , although it shortens the trip , lasting closer to 3 hours than 4 .
Once blended , the mushroom-papaya-kiwi mix should be left to steep for no less than half an hour , to allow the chitinase to breach the cell walls which conceal the psychedelic alkaloids , and no longer than 45 minutes , otherwise your brew will lose potency . Best to keep the papaya seeds , they are packed with chitinase , and I ’ m a fan of their peppery flavour anyway . Season with a pinch of salt .
And , importantly , remember to use three times less shrooms . We are talking about microdosing after all … ;)
Might the arctic shamans ever realise they had inspired a cold enzymatic extraction process ? I think they probably have other things on their minds . In the same way , the Argan oil producers of Morocco most likely spotted almonds poking out of their goats ’ droppings and realised , with the entrepreneurial spirit so characteristic of their culture , that there ’ s money in shit . Either way , I love the human capacity for lateral thinking . Because , at the end of the day , you can ’ t polish a turd , but you can roll it in glitter …
Stay safe .
Ray , Brighton , 2024 .
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Editor ’ s note : The Whistler does not condone Ray ’ s opinions . We chose to publish this as we know there are many microdosers in the city . But remember , what works for Ray may not work for anyone else . BH
BHASVIC