Editorial
Have you ever noticed how people walk in winter ? They ’ re huddled , it ’ s like they ’ re wrapped around themselves . Coats wrapped round , hats held on tight . Bent over forward , making themselves smaller . Less to get cold and wet , maybe . And no one ’ s out . The streets look deserted . Maybe everyone ’ s inside somewhere having fun , but I don ’ t think so . I think they ’ ve wrapped up , gone to bed early , hiding under a duvet .
In the summer , it ’ s different . When we go out , we stand up , look out . We smile and wave at each other as we pass by . People are sitting outside pubs . It ’ s alive .
My Fine Wife always berates me when I tell her I ’ d be happy if I never saw another winter . “ You ’ ve got to have the dark to appreciate the light , you ’ ve got to have the winter because it ’ s part of the cycle of the year . You can ’ t have the warm if you don ’ t have the cold ”. Pah . Cold , schmold . OK , I ’ ve got some nice heavy wool suits and a rather fine long , fur coat , but that aside … Winter ? As Edwin Starr once said , what is it good for ? Absolutely nothing .
What ’ s so terrible about the idea of retiring to a small Greek island ? A little taverna on the beach in a horseshoe bay ? “ Calamari ? Of course . And would you like some Retsina with that ?”
No really , I ’ d be happy if I never saw another winter . Don ’ t like it . Don ’ t like the dark . Don ’ t like the cold . I don ’ t understand why the clocks go back or forward or whatever it is in the autumn so it gets darker ( and therefore colder too ) earlier . I used to be told “ Ah , it ’ s the farmers ”. I don ’ t know any farmers . I ’ m sure they ’ re lovely people but they ’ ve had their turn . Maybe now it ’ s my turn . Children will ask their parents why it is the clocks haven ’ t gone back or forward or whatever , they ’ ll ask why it ’ s still light and warm . “ Ah , it ’ s the magazine editors ...”
Anyway . That ’ s passed . The clocks have done the other thing they do and now it ’ s brighter later . I don ’ t have to wake the puppies up at 3pm to take them for a walk . Now I wake them at 5pm to take them out , It makes all the difference , The sky ’ s out . In a few weeks we ’ ll have that lovely , mad month when it ’ s the Festival , the Fringe , The Great Escape … probably a few other things I ’ ll remember later . It ’ s like a reward for all that farmer-inspired damp .
Meanwhile back on dry land , the online petition to save Seven Cellars and Latina from the evil clutches of The Coop Group stands at a fantastic 5,846 . And by the time Dan Tansley has done his printing magic and this becomes a
magazine , who knows what it ’ ll be . Funny how in the old days when the likes of Tesco were thought of as the Devil , the Co-op was seen as kind and benign . A cooperative . It sounded kinda cuddly . Well , there ’ s that idea gone . Anyway , let ’ s keep up the pressure . You never know .
Things are constantly changing round here . The Mighty Whistler , it ’ s like a shark . Always moving forward . Never staying still . We ’ ve got - at possibly huge expense - a new sports editor who this month is writing about the revolution in Whitehawk . And there ’ s another new development bubbling away in Whistler Towers . We ’ re going to start a listings section . What ’ s on and where to go . It would be lovely to have an old school listings section . It ’ ll mainly be in the website so we can regularly update it . It ’ ll take a bit of organising but I think it could be a thing to do .
View From The Hill ... Nicholas Lezard
I like to go on an adventure so the other Sunday I went with my friends Ben and Janine to see the Marina . In however many years of living here I have never been to the Marina . Going to Ben and Janine ’ s is already an adventure , because they live in Kemp Town . It ’ s a half-hour walk from my place to theirs so I make sure I ’ m well stocked up on Kendall Mint Cake . It ’ s an incentive to keep moving because I don ’ t like Kendall Mint Cake very much . I also take oxygen because they live on the 16th floor .
Anyway the Marina is another half hour walk from theirs so I bought an extra packet of Kendall Mint Cake because you can ’ t be too careful . The plan was to go to Wetherspoons for a restoring pint and then Malika Indian restaurant for lunch . But first we had to get to the Marina .
“ So what ’ s it like ?” I asked in the lift on the way down . Ben thought for a few seconds .
“ Let me put it this way ,” he said . “ Do you know what the murder rate in London is ? It ’ s something like two people per 100,000 per year . That ’ s how they measure it . Now , do you know what the murder rate in Baltimore is ? It ’ s 47 per 100,000 . In other words , you ’ re more than 23 times likely to be murdered in Baltimore than in London .”
I wondered where this was going . Was he about to say that the murder rate of Brighton Marina is roughly that of Baltimore ’ s ?
“ Anyway , a few years ago I was in Baltimore for work . And **** me , what a place . If you went into the certain areas of town people would just stand there with their mouths hanging open . People from outside normally know better than to go there .”
Again , I wondered where this was going . How long would I be able to fend off the gangs of Brighton Marina with just a pair of Kendall Mint Cake bars ?
“ The thing is , we went to Baltimore Marina . And you know what ? It was lovely . Lots of expensive boats , people having fun , fancy shops , the works . But Brighton Marina ? That ’ s what you ’ d expect Baltimore Marina to look like . They really should swap them over .
I began to see what he meant as we approached it . To get to the Marina you have to go through a desolate building site and a series of forbidding 1970s underpasses that all smell of glue . ( Not hard to work out why .)
“ This looks like the kind of place they filmed the ultraviolence scenes in A Clockwork Orange ,” I said .
“ I think it ’ s more the kind of place where Regan and Carter from The Sweeney chase the villains and give them a good kicking .”
Once you breach the Forbidden Zone , though , the Marina improves . A pint of IPA at Spoons is £ 1.68 and the buffet at the Malika is delicious . Just try not to inhale the glue fumes on the walk over there .