Bones ? Or no bones ?
You might not be able to teach them new tricks but everyone loves an old dog . Sam Harrington-Lowe looks at Fat Alice and wonders what ’ s her secret
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’ m under no illusion that the pug is an acquired taste . A taste I acquired about eight years ago with my first rescue , one-eyed Ruby Doo , and then again in 2016 with the current officer , Fat Alice .
Alice waddles towards me where I ’ m sitting on the sofa , and wants to be hoisted up , so she can sit on her parmesanfragranced blanket next to me . I ’ ve long since gone nose-blind to her cheesy smells , although they make the visitor ’ s eye water . We have a face-off , like High Noon . I know she is more than capable of jumping up on the sofa , but she wants me to lift her up . Guess who gives in .
Have you seen that famous senior pug , Noodle ? If you ’ re on social media , he ’ s hard to avoid . The ‘ bones or no bones ’ prediction each day , as his owner Jon hoists him up to sitting position in his bed . Will he stay sitting up , or slump like a sack of spuds back to slumber , indicating a ‘ no bones ’ day ? It ’ s wild .
People love the dog seniors – cats too . Alice is not a senior ; she ’ s middle-aged , but already showing some grey chops . Instead of finding this horrifying , like when I look in the mirror at my own jowls , I adore it . My daughter and I call her ‘ elderly ’, even though she really isn ’ t .
Why then , don ’ t we feel the same way about human seniors ? I have a grandmother who just turned 100 , and while I ’ m fond of her in a gosh-you ’ re-stillalive-please-stop-spending-myinheritance-on-care sort of way , she ’ s not endearing like an old dog is .
I have love for her , but I don ’ t really want to cuddle her . In fact , the closest I ’ ve been to her physically in recent years is when I had to emergency-remove insufficiently chewed pork chop from her throat before she choked to death in a restaurant .
But an ageing , smelly old dog , cat , or horse – I ’ m all over them with cuddles and the not caring about smell and moulting and scabby bits . Is everyone like this ?
Joking aside , we generally have a poor attitude towards ageing . Why are we not warm with our elders ? I melt when I see a snoozy old dog gently wagging a tail and chasing the sunlight across the floor all day . But I ’ m far less enamoured with old people . And we really need to address this , because we are an ageing population . People are
not having kids , and everyone is living longer . Hard not to envision the future as a kind of zombie apocalypse , the grey and infirm staggering around looking for blood – or Botox .
I think perhaps we need to reframe our oldies . Embrace their knowledge and wisdom , and give them the time of day . Interestingly , when I was 16 , I had a job as a sleeper in an old people ’ s home , and I loved it . I ’ d chat to the oldies , look at their photos , fascinated by their pasts . These days I ’ d recoil . Is it my own advancing years that makes them less palatable ? I can see my own mortality looming closer ?
I expect one day I ’ m going to need helping on to the sofa , to
my own smelly blanket . I ’ m going to forget what I ’ ve said , and tell young people the same thing over and over again . I ’ m going to dribble , and possibly whiff a bit . Frankly , I expect my daughter would say I ’ m already there .
Going forward I ’ m going to try and apply a bit more patience and give a bit more time to oldies , and encourage everyone to do the same . Maybe we can even learn from them . If we ’ re lucky , we ’ ll be old at some point , and it would be nice to feel loved and appreciated , wouldn ’ t it ?
Sam is founder and Editor-in- Chief of Silver Magazine – for the mature maverick www . silvermagazine . co . uk
LETTERS
Dear Sir , I read the article in the latest edition of The Whistler regarding the Seven Dials Roundabout . I thought at the time the roundabout was rebuilt that something in the middle was missing . I wondered what type of statue or focal point might be appropriate , as it mustn ’ t obscure views for traffic , hence it would need to be see-through . I ’ ve enclosed a rough sketch of an idea , made of metal hoops . It could be a weather- vane , or sign post , or a statue , surrounded by bollards . This could be a competition for ideas to be submitted .
Obviously before that , the council would need to be approached for their advice to see if such an idea would need planning permission , building regulations , or even if such an installation would be legal .
Good luck with this idea . I hope it gets lots of interest and support .
John Weeks , Seven Dials
Dear John - Thanks for your support and your sketch . I think this idea could work . Maybe other readers could write in with suggestions . Jed