The Virtuous Daughter Magazine Fall 2017 edition Cherish | Page 30
as God sees them is your best tool
for learning how to relate proper-
ly—and don’t we all long to know
how to relate to men meaningfully
but appropriately, whatever stage of
life we’re in? Sadly, in our western
culture, we have moved a long ways
away from what God calls Manhood
and Womanhood. Many of us have
at least a slightly twisted view of
what both mean, and no satisfying
model to view that reaches inside
to something deep and says, “Yes!
That’s it!” Real womanhood func-
tioning alongside true manhood is
probably the most intoxicatingly
beautiful and wonderful thing God
ever ordained. But what does it look
like, what does it feel like, and…
how do I get there?
We definitely have some tips and a
few pieces of the puzzle that have
been lost to the surrounding Amer-
ican culture in past years. In our
conservative culture, we have been
handed many gems from our heri-
tage—we owe our parents a debt of
gratitude for that! They have taught
us one of the most essential parts of
what it means to be a true woman:
to “do well.”
not afraid with any amazement.” 1
Pet 3:6 KJV (emphasis mine)
Most of you have learned the “do
well” part well enough that, like me,
you’re burdened down with anxiet-
ies that you don’t do enough. Shoot.
That sort of nullifies the second
part of that verse, huh? ;) Doing
well perhaps we understand, but
how do we get to this place where
nothing, however sudden, can make
us scared? Is this really who God
made women to be? And if so, why
is it so far from what we experience
today? Is there really any way to get
to a place of absolute rest? What
does it look like?
“There is no fear in love; but
perfect love casteth out fear:
because fear hath torment. He
that feareth is not made perfect
in love.”
1 John 4:18
It’s interesting--I asked my hus-
band what I should tell young wom-
en that men really want from them
in a dating relationship. He said,
“To be fun. Just simple and trust-
ing.” (And he made all this contin-
“Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham,
gent on finding a good man who
calling him lord: whose daughters
ye are, as long as ye do well, and are protects a woman’s trust). What
captured his heart when we were
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dating (and I will attest to this,
though it shocked me as I observed
it) was actually my weakness and
my need for him. All I really needed
was to have my heart ready to trust
and receive from him all he longed
to pour into me to lift me up. But
that kind of trust is hard to come
by for us women, especially if we’ve
been hurt in life. Who naturally
wants gives up their life unless they
fully believe they’ll be taken care
of? That is why I want to introduce
you to the earlier part of the pas-
sage quoted above:
“The holy women also, who trusted
in God….” 1 Pet 3:5 KJV
I would like to submit to you that
the only way you will ever be able
to submit to an earthly authority,
do well, and do so without anxiety
is because you hope [with unre-
served confidence] in God. I know
that sounds cliche, but I promise
you that your earthly relationships
will go NO further than your ability
to trust, and true trust comes only
from knowing you have a Creator
Who stays with you. Men will fail.
That doesn’t need to shake you
in the least. What we need to get
ahold of as women if we are going
to come fully alive as the vibrant,
carefree, trusting creatures God
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