The Virtuous Daughter Magazine Fall 2017 edition Cherish | Page 30

as God sees them is your best tool for learning how to relate proper- ly—and don’t we all long to know how to relate to men meaningfully but appropriately, whatever stage of life we’re in? Sadly, in our western culture, we have moved a long ways away from what God calls Manhood and Womanhood. Many of us have at least a slightly twisted view of what both mean, and no satisfying model to view that reaches inside to something deep and says, “Yes! That’s it!” Real womanhood func- tioning alongside true manhood is probably the most intoxicatingly beautiful and wonderful thing God ever ordained. But what does it look like, what does it feel like, and… how do I get there? We definitely have some tips and a few pieces of the puzzle that have been lost to the surrounding Amer- ican culture in past years. In our conservative culture, we have been handed many gems from our heri- tage—we owe our parents a debt of gratitude for that! They have taught us one of the most essential parts of what it means to be a true woman: to “do well.” not afraid with any amazement.” 1 Pet 3:6 KJV (emphasis mine) Most of you have learned the “do well” part well enough that, like me, you’re burdened down with anxiet- ies that you don’t do enough. Shoot. That sort of nullifies the second part of that verse, huh? ;) Doing well perhaps we understand, but how do we get to this place where nothing, however sudden, can make us scared? Is this really who God made women to be? And if so, why is it so far from what we experience today? Is there really any way to get to a place of absolute rest? What does it look like? “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 It’s interesting--I asked my hus- band what I should tell young wom- en that men really want from them in a dating relationship. He said, “To be fun. Just simple and trust- ing.” (And he made all this contin- “Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, gent on finding a good man who calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are protects a woman’s trust). What captured his heart when we were 30 dating (and I will attest to this, though it shocked me as I observed it) was actually my weakness and my need for him. All I really needed was to have my heart ready to trust and receive from him all he longed to pour into me to lift me up. But that kind of trust is hard to come by for us women, especially if we’ve been hurt in life. Who naturally wants gives up their life unless they fully believe they’ll be taken care of? That is why I want to introduce you to the earlier part of the pas- sage quoted above: “The holy women also, who trusted in God….” 1 Pet 3:5 KJV I would like to submit to you that the only way you will ever be able to submit to an earthly authority, do well, and do so without anxiety is because you hope [with unre- served confidence] in God. I know that sounds cliche, but I promise you that your earthly relationships will go NO further than your ability to trust, and true trust comes only from knowing you have a Creator Who stays with you. Men will fail. That doesn’t need to shake you in the least. What we need to get ahold of as women if we are going to come fully alive as the vibrant, carefree, trusting creatures God 31