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April 16, 2019 | The Valley Catholic
COMMUNITY
My Grandmother’s Legacy
Marie Galetto-Dugoni
Marketing & Grants
Program Manager, Catholic
Community Foundation of
Santa Clara County
My grandmother Teresa Machado
was a planner. She loved organiz-
ing events and hosting people in her
home. When my mom went to her
high school Senior Ball, my grandma
not only made a multi-course dinner
for my mom and her friends before
the dance, but she also got up at 11
p.m. to make midnight snacks for ev-
eryone when they returned. Once my
grandpa retired, she planned trips all
over the United States with him. And
when they got home, she made the
photos into slides and meticulously
documented what was in each picture.
I got married last November. My
grandma’s health had been declining
for some time, but she decided (despite
my protests) that she would throw me
a bridal shower. She made all the ar-
rangements, but two days before she
was admitted to the hospital. When it
became clear that she would be unable
to attend the shower, she insisted that
we have it without her. She had writ-
ten detailed instructions in case she
was unable to attend. She laid out the
menu, ordered the cake, organized the
decorations and told us exactly how
many balloons to place at the cake
table. She had thought of everything.
My grandma was determined to
make it to my wedding. I don’t think
anything would have stopped her
from being there, especially since I
wore the same dress that she wore
on her wedding day over 60 years
earlier. She had wisely planned ahead
by storing the dress in a cedar chest
so that if her daughter - and then her
granddaughter - wanted to wear the
dress, it would be in pristine condi-
tion. It was a true honor to wear her
dress and have her in attendance at
our wedding.
This January, my grandma passed
away. As in life, she had planned for
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what would happen after her pass-
ing. She picked out and paid for her
plot and headstone. She gave specific
instructions for the type of Funeral
Mass she wanted, down to the priest,
readings, songs and pall bearers. She
had an estate plan so that there would
be no question about what happens
with her house and other assets.
Through her thoughtful plans, she
left us the gift of peace as her legacy.
The experience of losing my grand-
ma drove home the value of having
a detailed estate plan. The Catholic
Community Foundation of Santa Clara
County hosts Estate Planning Seminars
at parishes to highlight the importance
of planning ahead. One of the biggest
advantages of having an estate plan is
relieving your family of the stress and
cost of going through probate court. It’s
also easier for people to comply with
your wishes if they know them. Some
people wish to remember their parish
or other organization they love with a
gift in their estate plan. No matter the
amount, a charitable legacy gift is an
expression of our values and a wonder-
ful act of stewardship.
If you are interested in making a
charitable gift part of your estate plan
or would like the Foundation to present
about estate planning and planned giv-
ing, please contact us at (408) 995-5219
or [email protected].
7:41 PM
Compassion Will Cure More Than Condemnation
By Gregory Kepferle, CEO,
Catholic Charities of Santa Clara County
C
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I have to confess the title of this ar-
ticle came from a saying on a fortune
cookie. The other night my wife and I
wanted some comfort food, so we drove
to a Chinese restaurant in Morgan Hill
and ordered our favorite dishes. At the
end of the meal, we opened our fortune
cookies and mine said: “Compassion
will cure more than condemnation.”
It hit me right in the gut. How often
have I condemned those with whom I
disagree, or who appear to have done
some terrible thing, or who I believe
have hurt me or ones I care about? How
can I do jiu-jitsu on my own judging of
people who condemn others or whose
behaviors I believe are worthy of con-
demnation? Jesus reminds us in Mat-
thew, “Judge not, least ye be judged”
and God’s rain pours down on the just
and the unjust alike.
How do I have compassion on some-
one who appears to be my enemy? It’s
not enough just to have good inten-
tions. I need to be mindful of the impact
on others of my own thoughts, my own
words, my own actions. “Compassion
will cure more …” not just for the other,
but also for myself.
How might my acts of compassion
cure me of my condemning? Do I prac-
tice listening with empathy? Do I avoid
making assumptions as to motives? Do
I go the extra mile without resentment?
Do I try to walk in the other person’s
shoes? I admit it is quite challenging.
Yet I find that when I do, then my
clenched heart opens wider and I am
“cured more.” And perhaps others
become aware that I have changed and
that gives them the freedom to become
open, too.
At Catholic Charities’ Behavioral
Health Services our counselors and
therapists listen with deep skill and
empathy, helping guide our clients who
struggle with mental and emotional
pain on a journey of hope, healing and
wholeness. In our Family Strengthen-
ing programs, parents and children
learn ways to communicate in healthy
ways. And all who come through our
doors are welcomed without judgment,
whether arriving with a disability, or
coming from jail, from living on the
streets, from being in a gang, or ar-
riving from another country with or
without papers.
I invite all who want to cure more
with compassion to support Catholic
Charities ministry of caring for those
most in need in our community.
To donate or for more information
go to www.catholiccharitiesscc.org.