The Spotlight issue 1 November / December 2013 | Page 18

Have you ever found yourself wondering why someone did this or said that? Then say to yourself, where is the common sense? Well if you haven’t, I have. I joined the IMVU Community in 2011. Since then I’ve learned and seen a lot. There have been times, it seems, I myself have lacked common sense when it came to my decision making. Rather than use the term “common sense” loosely, I decided to do a little research to find out exactly what common sense is, why some of us seem to have it and some don’t and if there is a way to learn “common sense”.

Common sense it the basic ability to perceive, understand, and judge things. Common sense is meant to keep us safe and living a “reasonable way”. Common sense is usually connected to universal truths and often based on conventional wisdom that can be true or false. It varies from place to place. What is considered common sense in one country, is not necessarily common sense in another.

Common sense belief’s can change over time. What was considered common sense hundreds of years ago, might not be common sense today. Some ideas that used to be common sense have been proven wrong.

Regular social interaction helps us to learn what constitutes common sense and how to use it. Knowledge can help develop your common sense. However it is due to lack of socialization that extremely smart people, who spend a lot of time alone, seem to lack common sense. As well, very emotional people tend to lack common sense. The brain produces emotion quicker than judgment. The difference is very minute, but just enough to cause an irrational response to something.

Adults can only be partially taught common sense. It would require a lot of “what if” situations, what the common sense response would be and why.

These are facts, however, we all at some point in time have found ourselves, thinking; “Why did I do that? Why did I say that? Where is my common sense?” Allot of times the question of where is my common sense comes up in matters of the heart. I’ve learned thru this research that when it comes to matters of the heart we tend to lead with emotion instead of our common sense. Common sense does not take the forefront in matters of the heart.

However we can use our common sense before we find ourselves in situations that emotions tend to take over. In relationships for example. Rational thinking beforehand will help you to decide if a person is right for you, if they are worthy of your love, trust, and devotion. Knowledge we learned is a key to common sense. It’s important to learn as much as you can about a potential mate. When it comes to matters of the heart, no question is a dumb one. Alone time is good, but get out, be social as you get to know the other person. Observe how they act , how they treat the waiter in the restaurant, how they interact with the opposite sex in your presence. Also observe how they interact with your family/ friends, as well as their own. Don’t be afraid to acknowledge moments of discomfort or awkwardness.

This is not to say you wont find yourself in relationship turmoil, however, what I am saying is that when and if you do find yourself there, all your decisions won’t be based on emotions. You will have all the common sense knowledge as well. The question then will be..”Do I follow my common sense ..or my emotions?”.

COMMON SENSE..NOT SO COMMON

Contributing Writer

MzEcor