The Power of Love
Recent claims that the instigation of gay marriage is the source of the recent spate of flooding has caused a political furore. However, the scientific community, shocked by this revelation, has set to work finding uses for such an incredible ability.
A special task force of newlywed homosexuals has been set up to alleviate any droughts that occur around the country, as those seen in recent years led to hardship for many and the damage, and even loss, of huge quantities of crops. If this task force is successful it could usher in a new age of water management. Britain would be ahead of the world in meteorological manipulation and will never experience water shortages again.
It has also been suggested that such a task force could be used in deserts to enable large scale agriculture, effectively solving food shortages. Indeed there have been mumblings in the EU that teams of the gayest individuals should be sent as aid workers to the Sahara desert to set up new farming communities.
Professor Arnold Wells, of the UK International University of Essex, has taken a different tack in trying to utilise this newly discovered human ability. He has designed and built a prototype machine he claims can provide free infinite energy. The machine has an apartment complex, which will host gay marriages, while underneath is a series of turbines designed to generate energy from incoming and outgoing floodwaters.
The Professor is appealing for volunteers to have their weddings within the apartment complex so he can test the machine thoroughly and so fix any issues that may occur. If successful he will begin large scale production and roll it out nationwide.
Thanks to the establishment of gay marriage, which has not only moved everyone closer to equality but is set to reduce drought, famine and energy shortages, a brighter future for everyone is on the horizon.
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