The Rockdale News Rockdale News Digital Edition October 8, 2014 | Page 5

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Breaking out of the ‘Man Box’:
Wednesday, Oct. 8, 2014

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Chanceviolence offenses and the role
Atkins Tennis Tournament make others
they feel might
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And since men are committing
these crimes at the fastest rate, it’s
time for more men to speak out
against the violence happening
to women as well, says Derek
Marchman, a Rockdale County
courts family violence consultant.
“The thing is domestic violence
advocates for the most part have
been women. For the most part, a
lot of the victims are women. It is
time for men to step up,” he said.
“The biggest thing in terms of
family violence is that we as men
have to do more. Think about,
we’re 90 percent of the reason
why it occurs.”

they must play is speaking out
against it and cultural things that
promote it.
“This is not an indictment of
manhood,” he said at the same
conference as Delgado. “It’s an
invitation to be part of solution.”

Don’t be a bystander
Marchmen offers this advice to
men who may not be sure how to
react if they find themselves in a
bystander effect situation.
It’s ok to say, “I don’t know
what the situation here is, but
what you’re doing here is wrong.
No one should be treated that
way,” he said. “Half the time
people just need to know that
people see them doing something
wrong. It’s not an issue of saying
the right words. The biggest thing
is taking some form of action.”
The co-founder of A Call to
Men, Tony Porter, adds that
men may find it hard to join
in the fight against domestic
violence because they’re stuck in
what Porter calls a “Man Box,”
which is stereotypical gender
socialization roles.
Some key ideas of Porter’s
“Man Box” is that men are
strong physically, while women
are weak and thus inferior, not
being allowed to show interest
in women outside of a sexual
context and fear of being thought
of as gay, which is also perceived
as a sign of weakness.
Being trapped in this box
makes men afraid of associating
themselves with anything that

perceived them as weak, inferior
or homosexual, says Porter.
Neither ignorance nor fear are
excuses for not making the right
decision.
“When it comes to bystander
effect, don’t let not knowing what
to do interf